Shadows
by FullMetal Edward
Summary: Al dies and Ed is forced to keep on living due to a promise he once made. He finds a loophole in that promise and exploits it. Doing so ends up giving him back everything he thought he'd lost, but did it really?
1. Prologue

PROLOGUE

_Edward Elric watched dumbly as dirt was shoveled into the grave. _

_DeadDeadDeadDeadDeadDeadDeadDeadDeadDead…_

_The mantra filled his head as he continued to watch. Voices swirled around and over him but none of them reached him. _

_Nothing could reach him._

_At some point the dirt stopped being shoveled._

_Edward clenched his fists, trying to fight back the urge to dig the coffin back up and get in._

_He had promised Al he wouldn't do anything like that. It was a promise they had made to one another, that if either one died the other would continue on and live for the both of them. At that time Ed had figured with his job and lifestyle that he would be the one to die._

_It had never occurred to him, even in his darkest nightmares, that Al might die first. _

_Now it felt as if the direction for his life had fallen away. For almost four years his mind had focused on one thing and one thing only, saving his little brother._

_He'd failed._

_So now what?_

_A hand fell on his shoulder and Ed was dimly aware that it was suddenly much, much later than it had been a second ago. Darkness covered the spot where the grave lay and cold bit through his clothing. Wordlessly he allowed the hand to turn him around and steer him back to the Rockbell's home. Once there he allowed other people to help him get ready for bed and then put him in._

_DeadDeadDeadDeadDeadDeadDeadDead…_

_Edward didn't sleep that night._


	2. Chapter 1

CHAPTER ONE

Roy Mustang glanced at the clock yet again and then tried to refocus on the paperwork in front of him. After realizing that he'd just read the same sentence for about the twentieth time, however, he gave up. Pushing it aside he stood and walked over to the window.

"His train won't be in for another hour, Sir."

Mustang glanced over his shoulder to where Riza Hawkeye had just walked in.

"What if it was too soon to send him out?"

Hawkeye frowned, "It's been six months. He's spent the entire time either staring out the window of his room or sitting on your office couch waiting for an order. If anything I think it may be past time."

Mustang sighed and went back to looking out the window. Ed had told him about the promise he and Al had made to one another. If something happened to one the other would continue living for the both of them.

Unfortunately, Ed seemed to have a rather odd definition of "living." He was alive, yes, but the boy was nothing more than a walking shadow of who he'd once been. He rarely spoke, never smiled, and obeyed orders quietly and without question. Under any other circumstances Mustang might have been happy with the sudden obedience but in this case he'd give anything for the boy to smart off at him like he used to. A month or so ago he had started sending Ed out on small missions around Central, little more than errands really, to try and get him out and about. Ed had accomplished each one without comment, even when Mustang deliberately sent him out on stupid missions such as finding a particular type of bread in the hopes that it would get a rise out of the boy.

It never did. Ed would go, do what he was told and come back. If asked for a report he would sit on Mustang's couch and write it in clear, concise language, hand it in and then go back to sitting on the couch like some kind of bizarre voice activated automaton.

Finally, Mustang had taken a leap and sent Edward to do a quick surprise inspection of one of the outposts situated in a town a day or so away from Central. Mustang had hoped sending him out into the world again would snap him out of it even just a little, perhaps get him to start showing an interest in life again.

He'd regretted the decision almost immediately and had spent the last two days worrying endlessly over whether or not he'd done the right thing. The kid barely ate for heaven's sake without someone standing over him and he'd decided to send him off alone? Granted he'd ordered the boy to call and check-in every day, several times a day in fact, but even so, what had he been thinking?

Turning, he faced Hawkeye.

"Bring the car around."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The scenery flashed by the window in an endless stream of movement. Ed found that if he left his eyes unfocused it would all blend together into one single blur that flashed by in an instant. He'd done the same thing on the train ride back from Resembool six months ago and was dimly surprised to find that one blur pretty much looked like another.

He'd shocked everyone when he'd decided to stay in the military and leave Resembool. Ed knew, however, that had he stayed he would have sat beside Al's grave and done nothing else for the rest of his life.

Al would not have liked that.

So instead he'd gone back with Mustang and the others and done the best he could to continue living.

If you could call it that.

They were almost back to Central and Ed tried to push back the grief that had been threatening to overwhelm him every minute of every day of the last six months and immediately felt a sense of immense guilt at trying to do so.

It was all because of that idiotic promise he'd made. He'd spent most of the last six months trying to figure out a way around it and finally, the first night he'd been gone as a matter of fact, it had come to him. It was a strangely simple answer; he'd have probably figured it out ages ago had he been thinking straight. Anyway, the answer had made him feel slightly better about things. He'd originally planned on not bothering to eat while he was gone but after finally figuring out the loophole he'd felt as if a giant weight had been lifted off his shoulders. Comparatively speaking he'd felt better than he had in six months and had actually found he had an appetite for the first time in a long time. Not much of an appetite but it was at least something.

For the first time life no longer seemed like a long endless stream of days that he would somehow have to make it through before he could finally be reunited with Alphonse.

He'd figured out a way around all that. Now he could be with Al sooner and do it without ever having to break his promise.

Of course he'd have to fool Mustang and the others, well, mainly Mustang. The man knew him too well even in the admittedly slightly off balanced state he'd been in for the past half a year.

He was aware of the train pulling into the station and then suddenly there was someone standing beside him. He looked up to see that not only was the train now empty but Mustang and Hawkeye were both standing there.

Ed frowned in confusion; they'd not even arrived at Central just a moment ago. He was having a lot of these time lapse things lately. It'd be one time and then suddenly minutes or even hours would have passed without him being aware of it.

"Sorry."

"It's all right" Mustang replied "How was your trip?"

Edward shrugged, "Fine. I did the report already, it's in my suitcase."

Said suitcase was already in Mustang's hand. He must have leaned over and reached over Edward's head in order to get it yet Ed hadn't even noticed.

"Come on." Mustang put a hand on his shoulder, he seemed to have to do that a lot nowadays, and pulled him up. Ed didn't resist and followed the older man out of the train.

He'd gotten pretty good at following.

The ride back to Headquarters was quiet and once back Ed took up his customary perch on Mustang's office couch. Studying him, Mustang could see the teen still looked worn, tired and thin but there was something different about him as well. A slight spark in his eye that hadn't been there, a somewhat straighter posture. The boy almost looked excited. He should have been happy that his plan seemed to have succeeded in pulling the Edward out of his shell a little bit.

Instead, Roy felt an intense and inexplicable dread. Angrily he shook it off. After six months, this was the best he'd seen Ed at and now he wanted to question it? Did he want the boy to recover or not?

Walking back to his desk, Mustang picked up a sheet of paper that had been laying there for a while and studied it.

"Edward."

"What?"

Mustang turned around and said, "How would you like to go on a mission with me in a few days? There's been a report of a possible rogue Alchemist causing some problems in the South. I was going to send someone else to take care of it but from some of what I've read it might be best if I handle it myself."

Ed shrugged, trying to look nonchalant though his heart had suddenly started racing, "All right."

Mustang nodded, "Okay then. We'll be leaving in a few days. For now, why don't you take a walk for a while? You must be stiff after sitting on that train all day."

Without comment, Edward got up and walked out of the room.

Behind him Mustang started gathering up paperwork and prepared to leave for the day. He could never just send Ed off alone. Every time he did it, always near the end of the day, he'd always pack up quickly afterward and go catch up to the boy. Once there he'd say he'd gotten done early and the two could then walk home together. By now, Edward had to see through him but the teenager never said a word. So far, in the last six months, it hadn't been as bad as Mustang might have thought it would be to have the boy living at his home. He'd expected destruction and copious amounts of yelling but surprisingly Ed had proved an excellent houseguest. Roy had found, to his surprise, he actually enjoyed having the teen there. Not that he would EVER admit that to anyone.

Grabbing his coat off a chair, Mustang headed out the door. He was actually feeling slightly optimistic. Ed had done better than he'd hoped on the mission. Maybe getting out and getting back to work was exactly what the kid needed. A reason to get up in the morning and keep going.

Mustang still had hope that someday, maybe, he'd get at least part of the old Ed back.


	3. Chapter 2

CHAPTER TWO

The morning they were to leave dawned on Edward lying in bed staring at the ceiling. After a while, when the light had gotten sufficiently bright enough, the teen got up and went to the bathroom. He was already dressed in the same clothes he'd been in the day before and when he came back out it was a quick matter of grabbing his shoes and he was ready to go.

His first stop was the nearly empty cafeteria where he got a small tray of food and took it to the back corner of the room to poke at. It wasn't really that he wanted to eat, but he thought the others would leave him alone when he ate on his own and showed some interest in the world around him.

Edward wanted to be left alone. He'd wanted that all along but now with his little idea percolating in his head it was even more important. If accomplishing that meant fooling the others into thinking he was recovering then so be it.

Once he'd eaten a small amount and pushed the rest around enough that it looked as though he'd eaten, he knew the few people actually in the cafeteria would not hesitate to run to Mustang with a full report, Edward threw it in the trash and went to the Colonel's office. No one was there yet; it was still pretty early, so he sat down against the wall outside the man's door and waited. Staring at the wall on the opposite side he idly thought about the number of times he and Al had walked down this very corridor. He almost thought that if he strained his eyes extremely hard or listened equally well that he'd catch a glimpse of a giant suit of armor or possibly the sound of heavy footsteps treading down the hall. Maybe he'd even hear the faint sound of one of those blasted cats Al was always finding and putting in his armor.

Footsteps sounded down the hall and a moment later Mustang knelt down beside him.

"Ready to go are you?"

Ed shrugged, "I suppose."

To tell the truth he WAS interested in going though he wouldn't admit it to Mustang. The blasted man was too smart for his own good and Edward had a feeling that if he admitted his anticipation the Colonel would be able to ferret out the truth. He was pretty sure the man had been BORN suspicious. Right then, however, he could see the happiness in Mustang's eyes as he stood back up to unlock his door. He thought that Ed was simply FINALLY starting to feel just a bit better, that he was finally getting through to him and he probably hoped that this next mission would further the breakthrough.

What he didn't know was that Edward hoped to die on this mission. Al had made him promise to not kill himself but he'd never said anything about Ed not dying at all. Okay, so it wasn't a great loophole but it was a loophole nonetheless. It meant Ed still couldn't kill himself, but he was sure that if he just kept going on missions, every mission the Colonel asked him to go on then it was bound to happen sooner or later. Especially if he just so HAPPENED to fail to block fast enough or dodge in the right direction. That wouldn't be breaking the promise, right?

Every mission Ed had ever been on had always carried the risk of death with it in some form or another. Before, Alphonse had always been there for him. In fact, just off the top of his head Edward could think of no less than three separate occasions where Alphonse had directly saved his life. Three different times when he should have been dead but had somehow made it out thanks to his brother. Three different times in situations he'd WANTED to live through. How long would he last without his brother OR the desire to keep living?

It only took one event and now Ed would be going alone for most of his missions. Hearing about the rogue alchemist from Mustang, Ed had thought it sounded perfect. Also, the fact that the Colonel was going meant there existed the possibility that the man might wind up in danger and, if that happened, Edward would of course be duty bound to save his commanding officer even at the expense of his own life.

His thought process didn't seem quite right to him, there were definitely holes in his logic but he shoved them aside into the back of his mind. It would work. He just had to be patient and patience was definitely something he'd picked up in his years searching for the philosopher's stone. He stayed leaning against the wall while Mustang got whatever it was he needed out of the office. When he returned Ed got up silently and followed the older man down the hall.

Upon leaving the building he was surprised to see Hawkeye, Havoc and Breda standing by the car. At his look, Mustang just shrugged and said, "They wanted to go. Having extra people won't hurt either. From my reports this alchemist seems to be more of a nuisance than an actual danger but, then again, just from virtue of being an alchemist you never know what could happen."

That was true. Ed had had personal experiences several times with alchemists who, for the most part, were idiots but had just enough knowledge to get themselves and everyone around them killed. His mind switching to another track, Edward suddenly found himself wondering if Mustang had actually asked the others to come because he had realized this was Edward's first actually dangerous mission in six months and there was no way to know what his reaction might be.

The thought that Mustang might have brought them along in the event that Ed failed him hurt his feelings.

Almost immediately, an ugly voice in his head sneered at him.

_And why shouldn't he expect you to fail? You did it once already didn't you? And it was with your own brother too! If you could fail your own blood why should the Colonel think you wouldn't fail him as well?_

_Why should anyone trust you at all?_

Ed mentally cringed away at the words. They, like the time lapses, came up at weird moments, usually when he least expected it or, worse yet, when he dared for a second to stop thinking about Alphonse.

"Are you all right?"

Looking up, Edward saw Mustang and the others now clustered around him looking worried. Worried, Ed had found, was the new expression of just about everyone when they saw him.

"I'm fine" he said simply.

Mustang's eyes narrowed, "Are you sure you're up to this? You don't have to go. In fact, I don't have to go either. We could both stay behind if you want."

Ed knew that wasn't true. Sitting on Mustang's couch without moving or saying anything for long periods of time meant people tended to forget that he was there and could hear everything that was being said. Because of that, he'd heard most of the phone calls Mustang had gotten from his superiors. Enough that he could fit together Mustang's responses and figure out pretty well what the other side was saying. The calls were from the same superiors that were afraid Mustang would some day come up and pass by them all. Every now and then they would do something to try and trip him up, such as suggesting that Mustang had been stuck behind a desk so long that he'd gone soft and was incapable of leading in a battle situation if needed. Of course the higher you moved up the ranks, they suggested, the more battle experienced you needed to be and it really looked as if Roy might not have what it took anymore.

Privately, Edward wondered how long it had been since any of THEM had ever been out to the front line of ANYTHING. Regardless, it had pretty much forced Mustang to head a mission himself to prove he was still capable and originally Edward had figured the Colonel had just decided to drag him along as an added bonus to try and get him out of his shell more. After all, the FullMetal Alchemist was a valuable resource and it was in Mustang's benefit to get him back to good working order, right?

Now, however, Edward wasn't sure. Offering to stay behind wasn't just an empty offer; it could actually jeopardize Mustang's career and his chances of being promoted. Was it actually possible he'd wanted Ed to come along because, yes, he wanted to help him get back to normal but also because he actually CARED about him? That he might have even been worried about leaving Ed alone in Central for the week or two the mission would take, thereby constituting the longest time Ed would have been alone in six months?

Could anyone actually care after what he'd done or, in this case, failed to do?

_Fool, as if anyone could care about you. As if you DESERVE to have anyone care about you._

Ed's mind shut down. Of course, he was an idiot. Mustang was just bluffing was all, trying to get a reaction out of him. Maybe he even knew what Ed was thinking of doing and was in favor of it.

Maybe the real reason the others were coming was so Mustang would still have back up after he'd finally gotten rid of Edward.

Maybe that's all this entire thing was.

Taking a deep breath, Edward focused up at Mustang and simply said,

"It's okay, I want to go."

Mustang frowned at him for several long minutes as if debating something within himself. Finally, however, he simply nodded and straightened back up.

"All right," he said "Let's head out."

And so they did.


	4. Chapter 3

_**Author's Note**__: Longer chapter because there was a certain point in the story I wanted to get to before finishing. To those that have reviewed my stories or put them on alert or favorites, thank you so much!!!! ____ I was worried no one would like them at all!! Anyway, here is the next chapter to Shadows. I hope you enjoy. The chapter after this will be along shortly. It's actually already written in my head, I just need to sit down and type it up. Thank you again for reading my stories! ___

CHAPTER THREE

Roy Mustang was pretty sure that he would never completely get feeling back in his right arm. This was because one Edward Elric had spent most of the train ride slumped against it sound asleep. This should have made him happy as he was pretty sure Ed hadn't strung together more than two consecutive hours of sleep in a very long time.

In addition to this, he'd had more than one officer stop him in the hall on the way to his office the morning they'd left to inform him they'd seen Edward in the cafeteria eating on his own without anyone standing over him.

Add that to the fact that Ed had gotten up and come to Mustang's office also on his own and appeared genuinely interested in the mission and Mustang should have been very happy indeed. It would appear Ed was finally moving on with his life.

It should have been a good thing.

Instead Roy couldn't seem to shake a sense of impending dread.

Ed had spent the last six months in little more than a dazed stupor; it wasn't something he would just suddenly get over. Even after that last mission Roy had expected little more than a hope the boy would start taking a few more walks. Maybe he'd even start talking to the people that cared about him and who spent large portions of their day worrying over him.

This, however, was too much. The others didn't see it but to Mustang it was as if warning flags were waving in front of his face.

Edward had made a decision, about what Mustang didn't know but he had a strong feeling it didn't involve getting better.

The problem was he couldn't for the life of him figure out what the kid's plan was. Ed wouldn't break the promise he'd made to Al but Mustang had no doubt that if he found a way around it he would take it without hesitation.

Ed had some kind of plan and Mustang just hoped he could figure out what it was before it was too late. Especially since they were even then on their way to the home of the Alchemist they'd been sent to investigate. Upon arriving, the group had barely settled into the hotel before heading out. Mustang didn't want to give the man a chance to hear about them and skip town. If that happened it could be a while before they found him and by that time there was no telling what problems he could cause.

According to reports the man was creating chimeras, an act which was illegal but was ESPECIALLY illegal when your creations kept escaping and terrorizing the populace. So far there hadn't been any serious injuries to anything but the chimeras, the Alchemist was apparently rather inept, but that could change. Even an idiot could be dangerous and Roy didn't want to wait around for the man to accidentally create a deadly chimera, promptly get killed by it, and then leave others to clean up the mess it would cause as it ran amuck.

Leaving the car, the group approached the house only to see the door appeared to be open before they'd even gotten halfway.

To normal people that might not have meant anything. To a group of very paranoid military officers it meant they were probably in extreme trouble already.

Roy barely had time to think "oh crap" before three very large and very pissed off looking chimeras came running out toward them.

Without even hesitating, he snapped his fingers and a moment later three roasted chimeras lay on the path. Simple enough but Roy had a feeling it wouldn't be THAT easy the entire time.

Mentally he sighed; he could just tell it was going to be one of those days.

Beside him, Edward ducked his head to hide his disappointment. He'd seen at once that the three creatures coming at them had had size and little else. From what he'd seen before Mustang burned them, a poor transmutation job had had the creatures already falling apart to the point where killing them had probably been the most merciful thing that could have been done. Walking past the charred remains with the rest, he could see even more of the mismatched, patchwork job the alchemist had done.

If he got killed by this Alchemist it would be downright insulting.

Glancing over he caught Mustang studying him and immediately attempted to clear his face of whatever emotion was on it. Ed knew full well that the Colonel was suspicious but he also knew he'd not figured anything out yet or Ed wouldn't be anywhere near this place. Most likely Mustang would have him committed if he found out what Ed was thinking.

Mustang would find out, Ed knew, which was why the sooner he got himself in sufficient danger the better.

The inside of the house was old, decrepit and in serious need of cleaning. Not only that but it became quickly obvious that that the Alchemist in question had been allowing his creations to share the house with him. Out of the corner of his eye, Ed saw Riza and the others actually jerk slightly as the smell hit them. Only he and Mustang didn't react.

Dimly, Ed wondered what that said about them.

As they walked through the house, Ed started noticing various books strewn here and there. Passing one in particular, he happened to glance down at the title and immediately froze. After a moment, moving as if he were in a daze, he walked over to another book and looked at that title and then another one after that.

He already knew what he would find; fate REALLY hated him after all.

"What is it FullMetal?"

Tonelessly, Edward began reading off the titles of the books.

"'Chimera Synthesis.' 'Alchemic Augmentation,' 'Biology and Alchemy.' These are all banned books. I looked for them for years." Dropping the books back on the ground, Ed let out a bitter laugh and said, "Doesn't it make a sick kind of sense that I would find them now when they don't do me any good anymore?"

Mustang's jaw tightened but he didn't say anything. After a moment he walked forward and put a hand on Ed's shoulder. As he turned him back to walk over to where Riza stood Ed suddenly spoke up and said, "I think I'll kill him."

"Excuse me?"

"The books were here" Ed said quietly "All this time they were in the hands of an idiot who didn't even have a use for them and wouldn't have known how to use them even if he DID have a use. All that time here I am NEEDING those books, searching everywhere for them and he just had them stashed in a corner like they were worthless."

"You don't know if they would have helped Ed."

"You don't know if they WOULDN'T have helped" Ed shot back, "And now we'll NEVER know because that BASTARD WAS HOARDING THEM HERE THE WHOLE TIME!!!"

He was royally hacked off and Mustang found himself conflicted about how to deal with it. On the one hand he didn't want Ed committing murder, that was for sure, but, at the same time, it had been a long time since he'd seen Ed show true emotion about anything and didn't feel that reprimanding him for it would be the right course of action.

So in the end he simply continued guiding the fuming young man in front of him while shooting a silent look at Hawkeye. She nodded and took up position directly behind Ed. Together they'd make sure he didn't do anything he'd regret later. Hopefully.

"Colonel."

Mustang glanced over as Havoc appeared in the doorway. Ed frowned; he hadn't noticed the man leave. Come to think of it, hadn't Breda been there as well?

"What is it?"

"We've found a doorway leading to a basement. The rest of the house is clear."

Mustang nodded. "All right."

He walked forward and almost unconsciously the rest of the group took up postures that ended up with Edward in the middle.

Ed, of course, was completely oblivious to this. He was still angry about the books, at fate and most of all at himself for not being able to find them sooner.

Six months too late. Six lousy months.

The stairs did in fact lead to a basement and one of the first things Ed saw were the transmutation circles painted on each of the walls, including the wall directly across from them that had a door set in it. From behind that door came sounds that were very clearly inhuman, clearly ticked off and clearly not confined in any way.

Beside him, Mustang sighed and said, "Great, it sounds like we might already be too late."

Ed shrugged, "Why does it matter if they've done our job for us?"

"Because now we have to clean up the mess" Mustang replied "Instead of forcing the idiot to do it." He focused on the circles and said, "What do you think those are for?"

Ed walked over to the nearest one and studied it with a frown. After a moment he said, "I don't know. I'd say it wasn't created by our guy though, at least not originally. All the reports we've gotten and what we've seen ourselves suggest this guy doesn't have all that much talent. I don't know what these do but I can tell you THEY weren't created by an amateur."

A thought occurred to him right about then and glancing back at the others Ed suggested "You know it's possible he saw it in one of those books and simply copied it out."

Mustang snorted in disgust.

"Then he's a bigger idiot than we thought. Those books were banned for a reason. Stay away from the circles, I doubt they're stable. Even brushing against them could inadvertently activate them."

It was possible. Ed turned back to study the circles again. He wondered what would happen if……..

Unbeknownst to him, Mustang was suddenly have a proverbial lightbulb moment. The words he'd just said and the way Ed had immediately turned back to the circles instead of away, had actually stepped closer to them in fact, had suddenly and clearly made him realize exactly what Ed was up too.

He knew why the teenager was suddenly behaving as if he was getting better, as if it were okay to let him alone.

He knew why the teenager had seemed excited to come on this mission.

He knew why he'd slept on the train and why it felt as if he'd come to a decision of some kind.

Mustang knew what the loophole to the promise was and he also knew that he'd made a horrible, terrible mistake in letting Ed come.

He stepped forward, raising an arm to grab the boy by the jacket and physically drag him back from the circles, to throw him back to Breda, Havoc and Hawkeye and have them drag him out of the basement.

It was too late.

Mustang had allowed himself to become distracted by the circles and then by Edward. In the back of his mind he'd been aware of the fact that whatever was on the other side of that other door had been trying to get out but he'd relegated it to the back of his brain. None of the others had noticed either, they too had been distracted by Mustang and Edward. It was almost unbelievable that all four of them would be distracted at the same time.

But it happened.

The door splintered open and suddenly chimeras were simply pouring out. They were all in pathetic shape but the sheer number of them was absolutely ridiculous and Mustang knew even pathetic, poorly made chimeras could kill if there were enough of them. The space in the basement was far too small for Mustang to simply blow them all up without risking his subordinates which meant he would have to get them out, back to the stairway and then do it from there. Unfortunately the chimeras had already cut them off and didn't plan on happily parting for them anytime soon.

It was in a situation like this that they needed the FullMetal Alchemist. His alchemy could be fine tuned better than Mustang's while still causing large scale damage. It would also not run out like bullets. Already they were all firing and reloading as rapidly as possible. Mustang too had pulled a firearm out and was trying desperately not to get eaten.

They NEEDED the FullMetal Alchemist.

It was strange, sometimes, how fate worked. Every now and then it would give you just exactly what you wanted most at the very time you least wanted it.

But, then again, maybe it WAS just because the world was out to get Edward Elric.

When the door burst open, Ed jerked in surprise and turned around. Because of that he was caught off guard when the first chimera slammed into him and promptly knocked him back into the transmutation circle carved on the wall.

Mustang was right.

It was unstable.

It activated.

The last thing Ed saw was Mustang, Breda, Havoc and Hawkeye surrounded on all sides fighting a losing battle with the chimeras.

He cried out to them and struggled to move, to help them, but it was useless.

Light overcame him and he was gone.


	5. First Interlude

**First Interlude**

"_Hey Ed?"_

"_What is it, Al?"_

"_Can I ask you something?"_

"_I guess, what?"_

"_Well, it's not really a question I suppose. I want you to promise me something."_

"_We can't have a cat Al."_

"_Brother, this is serious!"_

"_All right. What is this promise of yours?"_

"_I want you to promise that if I die--"_

"_You're not going to die."_

"_But if I do--"_

"_You won't."_

"_Edward!"_

"…"

_Promise me that if I die you'll keep living."_

"_What are you talking about?"_

_You know what I'm talking about. You carry too much guilt around, more than your fair share. Not only that but you've made me your focus for so long that I'm afraid of what would happen if that focus was suddenly gone. Promise me, Ed. If I die you'll keep living for the both of us."_

"…_all right…but only on one condition."_

"_What?"_

"_That it goes both ways. Either of us dies and the other keeps living for both, got it?"_

"_Fine, I promise."_

"_All right. In that case, I promise too."_

"_Do you mean it Ed?"_

"_Of course I mean it! I wouldn't have said it otherwise. What brought this on all of a sudden anyway?"_

"_I don't know. Lately I've been feeling…"_

"_Feeling what?"_

"_I don't know…just…forget it."_

"_No, if something is wrong then I want to know, what is it?"_

"_Really Ed, I'm fine. Just forget it."_

"_Are you sure?"_

"_Yeah."_

"_Okay."_

"_Ed?"_

"_What?"_

"_Don't forget the promise."_

"_Don't worry Al, I won't."_

"_Good, thank you."_

"_You're welcome."_

"_Good night."_

"_See you in the morning."_


	6. Chapter 4

**Author's Note**: _Another cliffhanger!! Sorry, cliffhangers always drive me nuts and here I am doing it! I actually try to limit my chapters in terms of length, somewhat, so you all don't have to read a book length chapter. Because of this, however, I end up running out of space before I run out of chapter and then I have to cut things and move them around to other locations and it winds up cliffhanging! Apparently I'm rather long winded. Anyway, I hope you enjoy. I will say there's at least a few more Interlude Chapters on the way but I'm not sure where I'll put them yet, one MIGHT come after this one. A lot of the story needs to be told via flashbacks and this was the best way I could think of to do it. I WILL try to update fairly quickly though to not leave you hanging. On a side note, once you reach the end of this chapter you'll probably be thinking WHAT THE HECK??? Don't worry; it'll make sense in a few chapters! Enjoy and thank you again for all the great reviews!_

CHAPTER FOUR

Edward opened his eyes to find himself staring at a blue sky overhead. That was odd; he hadn't been expecting to open his eyes on anything ever again.

Unless……………

He jerked upright to a sitting position and nearly passed out from the sudden wave of dizziness. Looking around he found he was still in what appeared to be the basement of the house he'd been in a moment ago.

Okay, not Heaven then.

The others weren't there anymore, neither were the chimeras. In fact, as Ed looked around he saw that most of the house wasn't there anymore. Pushing to his feet, he slowly turned around and surveyed the dirt and debris scattered throughout. If he didn't know better he'd say it had been like this for a very long time.

"Colonel? Lieutenant Hawkeye?" There was no answer.

"Havoc? Breda?" Still nothing broke the silence aside from his own voice. There wasn't any blood so Ed thought that was a positive sign. Of course there also wasn't any blood from the chimeras so what did that mean? Had they escaped and the others had been forced to give chase? It could explain why they'd left Ed unconscious in the basement.

Well, that or they just were happy to be rid of him.

Ed pushed that thought away and then walked over to stand under the square of sunlight shining down on him. From what he could tell the area around it looked fairly stable. Kneeling down he clapped his hands together and placed them against the dirt floor of the basement. Trying to take as little as possible to not upset the foundation and walls, he created a small tendril that wrapped around his waist. Placing his hands on that part he continued the transmutation so that it lifted him up through the opening, over the pile of debris and set him down safely on the street outside of the house.

Or at least what was left of the street.

Turning to survey the town Ed was stunned to see not the small but thriving town they'd arrived in that morning but rather a heap of twisted debris, dust and destruction. There didn't appear to be any signs of life and Ed could hear no sounds of battle anywhere.

Could the chimeras have really done all of this? Ed knew Roy and the others wouldn't have caused this kind of damage but then what the heck had done it?

"Hello? Is there anybody there?"

It wasn't very smart to give away his location when he didn't know what was going on but Ed didn't really care at that particular point.

He began walking as there was nothing else to do and the only sounds he heard were his own feet as they scraped through the dirt and occasional debris littering the ground.

The entire town was dead.

Finding the train station, Ed could see the tracks were mostly destroyed and a jumbled heap of metal might once have been a train but that had been a long, long time ago.

What the HECK was going on??

Feeling a growing sense of panic, Ed began running through the town searching for anything at all. At that point he might actually have been happy to see the stupid chimeras. He returned at one point to the house and basement and found, somewhat to his surprise, that one whole wall still held a completely intact transmutation circle. All attempts to activate it failed, however, and he finally gave up and left again.

In the end, after determining there really wasn't a single living thing left in that town, he simply started out for Central, walking.

He'd thought perhaps, when he had woken up, that he was in Heaven and would soon be reunited with Al.

Now, however, he was in a world where everything seemed to have been destroyed and there was no sign of life whatsoever.

This wasn't Heaven.

It was Hell.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

On a hilltop in Resembool, a young man stood before a pair of graves. The breeze shifted, blowing the youth's blonde hair into his eyes and he idly reached up a hand and shoved it back. In the other hand he held the chain of a silver pocketwatch that he loosely swung in a circle as it dangled at his side.

Hearing footsteps behind him, the teenager turned slightly as a young woman walked up behind him.

"Are you sure about this?"

"It's a little late for that now, don't you think? I've already joined."

The young woman frowned as she too turned and looked at the grave.

"I don't like it. I already lost one of you. What'll I do if you're both gone?"

"Don't worry, things are different now. It's safer."

"That's not true and you know it. One threat goes and there's another half dozen lined up to take its place."

The teen sighed and stayed silent for a while. It was growing colder as evening fell and he pulled his coat tighter around him.

"I don't think this is what he meant."  
"What?" The boy turned and looked at her in confusion.

"One of you was supposed to live for the BOTH of you. It looks to me as if you're simply living HIS life, what about yours?"

For several long seconds, the young man didn't answer. Instead he kept his head down and just studied the graves of his mother and brother. In his hand, he slowly stopped swinging the watch until it lay still with not even the breeze being able to affect its movement.

"This IS my life, AND his as well. I WANT to do this. Brother made such a difference while he was alive; he was always so selfless, always ready to help. I want to do that too."

"And you think this is the best way?"  
"I do," came the response, sounding more confident by the minute, "The military has changed a lot. I know I can make a difference."

As if coming to a decision, he suddenly clipped the watchchain to his belt loop, dropping the watch into his pocket, and then turned and hugged the girl. She hugged him back, hard, and for a while they just stood there like that. Then, carefully, he let go and backed away.

"I'll see you soon."

"You better."

Then he was gone, just like that. The young woman stayed longer, visiting the graves of her parents. In the end, however, just before she left, she walked back to the two lone graves on the top of the hill and stayed there until it was quite dark. Then, finally, she turned and walked away and left them both alone in the quiet.

By that time, it had grown so dark that one would not have been able to read the inscription on one of the headstones, the newest one, but that was all right because she already knew it by heart:

_Here Lies Edward Elric._

_Brother._

_Friend._

_Comrade._

_In life, a Hero._

_In death, sorely missed._


	7. Second Interlude

**Second Interlude**

"_Ed."_

"…"

"_Edward."_

"…"

"_FullMetal!"_

"_What is it, Bastard? Can't you see I'm studying?"_

"_You need to come with me."_

"_What, now? I just barely got started."_

"_It can wait. Come with me now Edward."_

"_Why?"_

"_Don't be stubborn."_

"_I really don't have time for this. I promised Al I'd only spend an hour in the library and then we'd go try to find a home for the latest stray cat he found."_

"_Ed."_

"_What's with that look on your face?"_

"_What?"_

"_That look, right there, what is that?"_

"_Ed, just come with--"_

"_I have to go."_

"_What?"_

"_I have to go. I'm supposed to meet Al. I don't want to be late."_

"_Ed…"_

"_Let go of me, I said I have to go see Al."_

"_You can't."_

"_Why not?"_

"_Because…because he isn't here Ed."_

"_Well obviously, that's why I have to go. I have to go meet him at the dorms."_

"_You can't."_

"_WHY NOT?!"_

"_Because he isn't at the dorms."_

"_THEN WHERE IS HE?"_

"_He's…he's not anywhere Ed."_

"_Excuse me?"_

"_Edward…Ed…Alphonse…he's dead. He isn't here anymore."_

"…"

"…"

"_you're sick."_

"_Ed."_

"_YOU'RE SICK!! LET GO OF ME YOU BASTARD! I HAVE TO GO SEE AL!!"_

"_You CAN'T Ed! He's DEAD, you can't go see him anymore!"_

"_NO, YOU'RE LYING! AL WOULDN'T DIE, HE WOULDN'T LEAVE ME ALONE, __**LET GO OF ME!!!!**__"_

"_Edward, you have to calm down."_

"_NO! I HAVE TO GO SEE AL! LETGOLETGOLETGOLETGO!!!!!"_

"_AL!"_

"_AL! WHERE ARE YOU!"_

"_AL, ANSWER ME!"_

_ALPHONSE!!!!!!_

_**ALPHONSE!!!!!!!!**_


	8. Chapter 5

_**Author's Note**__: To Magik Dragen: Ta-Dah!!! Enjoy! _

CHAPTER FIVE

It took a LONG time for Ed to walk back to Central since, as it turned out, he had absolutely no money on him for a train ride. In several areas he'd trying showing his watch and using his status as a State Alchemist to get money for a ticket. Upon identifying himself, however, he was quite startled to find himself yelled at, or even threatened with imprisonment. Usually, as soon as the person started yelling and acting crazy, Ed would take off so he never quite heard whatever it was they shouted after him.

He was quite used to people being angry at him for being a State Alchemist.

He didn't understand why they were mad at him for being Edward Elric though.

It occurred to him as he traveled that now would be a perfect time to get his plan taken care of. It would probably be assumed he'd died back in whatever it was that had destroyed the town and no one would ever be the wiser.

The only problem was that last sight he'd caught of Roy and the others facing imminent death. He didn't know the reason why they'd left him behind. If it was because they were simply sick of him that would be one thing but if it was because something had happened to them, if they were even in danger at that very moment…..

Ed couldn't live with letting anyone else down.

So he went back. When he finally arrived in Central it was late at night and, as it would turn out later, it was a very good thing it was dark.

Ed trudged through the streets, completely exhausted. He'd been able to use alchemy to find water easy enough, just a matter of displacing soil and tapping into the underground water table. Food had been harder and, given that he was already malnourished, it had led to him being even weaker now that he would normally have been after such a trek.

So exhausted was he, in fact, that when he arrived at the square that led across to Headquarters he actually failed to notice the rather large statue smack in the middle until he'd actually walked right into it.

The pain and shock of it snapped him out of his hunger induced daze and he stumbled back several steps.

"What the heck? Since when has there been a statue here?"

As far as he could remember there had NEVER been a statue in the square in front of ANY of the Headquarters located throughout Amestris. It gave potential enemies something to hide behind, rig with explosions or use in other ways that Ed was currently too tired to think about.

It was a full Moon so when Ed had recovered himself sufficiently enough he walked forward to get a look at the statue that he had apparently managed to miss for the entire time he'd been in the military.

He was facing the back of the statue so he had to walk around and then crane his head up to make out what it was.

When he did he could only stand there with his mouth wide open.

"No. Freaking. Way."

The statue was of him. Well, it was SUPPOSED to be him. Walking to a nearby lamppost, Ed used alchemy to make the pole longer and bring it closer so he could see better. Staring at the statue, Ed found that he couldn't remember a single time when he'd ever looked quite that…heroic. The statue was posed simply enough but an invisible breeze was whipping his braid and coat back and the face was staged as if he were staring off into the distance.

Glancing down at the base he realized there was an inscription and he knelt down to read it.

_In Memory of the FullMetal Alchemist, Edward Elric._

_His Legacy Lives on._

In memory? What? Noticing something under the inscription he bent down again and found he was looking at a set of dates. The first was his birthdate but the second was from two years ago.

Frowning, Ed undid the alchemy to the lamppost and then slowly turned back toward Headquarters. Unsure about what to do he didn't enter through the front gates but instead snuck in. It wasn't hard; he'd noticed holes in the security some time ago but had never bothered to point it out just in case he ever needed to sneak in for something or other.

Once inside, he went straight to Mustang's office. He already knew that the Colonel had detailed files on every one of his subordinates so it wasn't hard to find the file cabinet where they were kept. Before that, however, he went and used alchemy to cover both the door and window and then flicked the light on. Now anyone walking outside in the hall or outside the building would simply see blackness. Also, if anyone tried to come in they'd assume the door was locked or the key wasn't working and it would give him time to get out.

After that was done he turned back to the cabinet. It was locked but something so simple wasn't going to stop him. Ed already knew that Mustang had his files split up by State Alchemists and non-State Alchemists and then alphabetized them from there.

It was a surprise, then, when he found his own file at the very front, alone and separated from the other files by a small divider.

It was thick, THAT wasn't a surprise, and he carefully carried it over to the desk to look through. He wasn't really sure why he thought he might find answers in his file but he really couldn't think of anything else to do. He'd had quite a while to think while traveling and, so far, he could think of nothing to explain the destruction of the town, the disappearance of the others, and the strange reactions of anyone he introduced himself too. Now add to that the bizarre statue and he was well and truly at a loss.

At first he saw nothing wrong with the file. Everything in it was neat and organized and covered incidents and missions exactly as he recalled having them.

Then he saw a difference. It was small, he might even have dismissed it as a typographical error, but then he saw another and still another after that. Some of them were small things like dates and times being a bit off, a bit different.

Other things, though, were larger. People he didn't remember meeting, missions that he didn't remember going on or missions that he DID remember going on but they hadn't ended the way that was reported in the file.

Then he reached the end of the file. The final entry was short and to the point, almost clinical. Glancing at the date, Edward noticed it was the same as the second date on the statue in the square. Feeling a growing knot in his stomach, he began to read.

_8:00 P.M. – Received a call reporting a sighting of Zolf Kimbley downtown. Once a State Alchemist with the title of "Crimson Alchemist," Kimbley reportedly escaped from a prison several months ago and has been searched for ever since._

_Further reports stated that said individual was involved in a fight with an Alchemist. According to eyewitness, the Alchemist was identified as the FullMetal Alchemist, Edward Elric._

_8:30 P.M. – Responded to area described to find evidence of battle but no sign of the participants. Immediately conducted a search of the area and was informed by witnesses of what sounded like screams coming from an alleyway approximately one mile from present location. _

_8:45 P.M. -- Upon responding to that location, located Edward and Alphonse Elric. At this time, Edward Elric had severe bleeding from a deep wound to his abdomen. Alphonse Elric was holding him and, at immediate glance, it was apparent the wound was fatal._

_Upon questioning it was determined that Zolf Kimbley had escaped after delivering the blow to Edward Elric and Alphonse had chosen to care for his brother instead of giving chase._

_At approximately 9:30, Edward Elric died from his wound. _

Edward stared blankly at the form. Flipping the page over he found a copy of a death certificate, HIS death certificate.

He wasn't dead. He WASN'T and he CERTAINLY hadn't been dead for two years!

Going back to the report once more he reread it and frowned at the abrupt way that it ended. Not only that but, according to the report, there was a sizeable time gap between the time of them supposedly finding him bleeding to death and the time in which he accidentally died. After how detailed the rest of the report was it was odd that this part would be so vague. What had happened during that missing time?

For a long while, Ed sat at the desk and stared at the file. He went back through it several times but nothing new popped out at him to explain what was going on. Eventually, he happened to glance at the clock and saw it was getting close to dawn. People would be showing up soon.

Standing back up, Ed gathered up the papers in the file and put it back together. He then walked over and replaced it. After he did so, he quickly started to flip through the rest of the files to try and see…anything, he guessed. He wasn't really sure what he was looking for.

A file caught his attention immediately. It wasn't all that big yet, suggesting the owner of the file was a fairly new recruit. Reaching in, Ed grabbed it and pulled it out. When it came to State Alchemists, Mustang had always had the quirk of placing their title on the folder and then putting their actual name inside the file.

Going by that, Ed could see that this new recruit was a State Alchemist going by the title of the Metal Alchemist. Ed raised an eyebrow at that; couldn't they have come up with a better title than that? He could guarantee no one went around calling this guy "Hey Metal, how's it going?"

Allowing a very small smile on his lips, Edward flipped open the folder to see what the guy's name was who had been cursed with such a horrible title.

His heart, and mind, stopped.

Slowly, the folder slipped out of numb fingers and fell to the floor. Ed didn't even notice, his wide eyed gaze still focused on his hands.

At his feet the papers slowly settled and stopped moving. One of them, the one Ed had seen, came to a rest near his feet. Had anyone else been in the room at that time they would have been able to see that the new recruit had joined the military approximately six months prior to the current date.

They would have also been able to see the name of the recruit.

Alphonse Elric.


	9. Third Interlude

**Author's Note: **For those that like the dialogue format of the Interludes it will be coming back. For the Third and Fourth Interludes I tried dialogue but it just didn't work for what I was trying to convey. So for those two it's more or less narrative. I like the dialogues, I think they're fun to write, so have no fear if you like that format, they will return!

**Third Interlude**

_In the beginning, Ed tried to bring him back. For hours upon hours he knelt over the pieces of an empty suit of armor and clapped his hands. Over and over and over, a neverending litany of a clap followed by the smack of palms on metal._

_Clap._

_Smack._

_Clap._

_Smack._

_Clap._

_Smack._

_Clap._

_Smack._

_On and on it went._

_Nothing ever happened. _

_Roy and the others watched and made no attempt to stop him._

_Perhaps they too weren't quite willing to give up hope, to believe that there really was nothing that could be done._

_After all, Edward was the FullMetal Alchemist._

_If anyone could bring Al back, HE could._

_The others took shifts watching over him. _

_Mustang._

_Hawkeye._

_Falman._

_Breda._

_Havoc._

_Fuery._

_Armstrong._

_All took turns watching the lesson in futility. _

_In the future, none of them would ever be able to hear the sound of hands clapping without cringing._

_Eventually, Ed stopped. _

_If the others thought it was because the worst was over they were deeply mistaken._

_Instead, Edward sat in the corner cradling a piece of metal and insisting that Al would be right back._

_It's okay, it's okay. _

_Al isn't gone._

_He just stepped out._

_He'll be right back, you'll see, he'll be right back._

_It's okay, really, it's okay._

_Really._

_You'll see._

_He'll be right back. He'll come back, you'll see, he'll come back._

_He'll come back._

_He'll come back._

_He'll come back._

_You'll see._


	10. Chapter 6

CHAPTER SIX

At some point in time, Ed's mind switched over to an automatic mode. In an almost trancelike state, he cleaned up and replaced the file in the cabinet. He then undid the alchemy to the door and window and left. Once out, his legs had seemingly taken on a life of their own and had propelled him to the area in Central farthest from Headquarters. This had led to his current location in an alleyway, next to a dumpster, in the warehouse section of the city.

Once there he sat down against the wall, wrapped his arms around his drawn up knees and struggled to make sense of what was going on.

Al was dead.

Ed knew that, he didn't like it nor did he plan to live with it, but he did KNOW it.

So what was going on?

He ran back through his mind the events that had taken place since he'd woken up in that house until when he'd seen the files supposedly reporting that he was dead and Al was alive and a State Alchemist.

The transmutation circle.

When he'd been flung back against it the thing had activated, he was sure of it. When'd he come too in that house he'd thought it had just failed in whatever it was designed to do but, had that happened, there would have been a rebound. The lack of a rebound meant it had worked as designed. That he hadn't really noticed that fact before showed him just how messed up his mind had been at the time. He should never have missed something so obvious.

Okay, then, so the circle had done its job.

Which was what?

When he'd come to in the house there had been another circle but that one HADN'T worked.

Why?

With an angry grimace, Ed leaned back against the wall. He HATED not knowing what was going on. Again he ran through events in his mind but this time he went back farther in time to the point at which they'd arrived at the house. As he did, he found himself thinking about the books scattered throughout the house. He'd suggested to Mustang at the time that the transmutation circles in the basement might have been copied from one of those books as they showed a talent not evident in what they knew about the rogue Alchemist.

Ed frowned and tried to think of the titles. Many of the titles, as he recalled, had been written by Kranz Oppendor. The man had been brilliant but had suffered a psychotic break at some point in his life. Unfortunately, he was able to hide this fact for a time and, because of this, numerous books had been published under his name and had later needed to be banned when it turned out the theories being expounded in them were truly insane. To attempt ANY of them would probably, and in several cases did, lead to the person attempting them dying in a particularly violent and unpleasant fashion.

Ed had been interested in a handful of the books more as a stepping stone than for any practical reasons. Oppendor WAS brilliant, even in his insanity, and Ed had hoped that some of the ideas might spark off his own mind and lead him in a new direction.

Not that any of that mattered now of course.

Trying to not think about THAT for a moment, Ed tried to remember what the majority of Oppendor's theories had covered. Ed had scrounged information about all the man's writing and theories when he'd learned about them and, if he recalled correctly, there were books about chimeras, big surprise there considering where they'd found them; books about biological augmentation, primarily lunacy from what he'd heard; and some bilge about alternate universes or some such----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

NO.

FREAKING.

WAY.

There was JUST NO WAY.

Ed had heard about that book, it was a source of humor more than anything else. The theory, according to Oppendor, was that there existed hundreds upon hundreds of alternate universes that existed next to one another but were each totally independent and separate from one another. Supposedly, Oppendor thought that all realities initially started off identical. Some stayed that way and some, for whatever reason, branched off in other directions. Oppendor had thought you could actually find a way to travel to these other worlds and find them identical to the one you had left, slightly altered or so different as to be unrecognizable. He also argued that each of these other realities would include "doubles" of each person. So, for instance, there would be an Ed in each universe, an Al, Mustang and so on. Some might be a nearly identical person while others could be radically, radically different.

If Ed recalled, Oppendor had been placed in a mental institution shortly after this work had been published and subsequently banned.

Perhaps that action had been a bit premature.

Shifting slightly to try and return feeling to his extremities, Edward considered the possibility that the man had been right. He didn't remember seeing a book in the house that looked like the alternate realities one but then he hadn't really done an exhaustive search. If there had been one then it could explain the circles in the basement. Oppendor often drew circles in his books. Unfortunately, Oppendor had a tendency to draw brilliantly FLAWED circles which failed and rebounded to the point where even Oppendor, crazy as he was, wasn't dumb enough to actually try to put them into practice.

So Mr. Idiot a.k.a. Rogue Alchemist had gotten a hold of one of the books and copied the circle onto the wall? Had he thought it would make a great escape plan?

Oh.

A thought suddenly occurred to Ed. If the man HAD planned it as an escape then it meant he could have used it and was currently running around loose somewhere in this place or world or whatever it was.

Wasn't that just great? Probably the ONE circle in all of Oppendor's books that actually WORKED and it was used to unleash an idiot onto an unsuspecting world.

Okay, okay. Getting on a roll thought wise, Ed stood up and began pacing back and forth in the back of the alleyway. So it would appear he'd wound up in an alternate world where he had apparently died two years ago.

And Al was alive.

Ed stopped.

Al was alive.

_Not YOUR Al, you idiot. What, do you think you can just run over and replace him just like that? Does he mean that little to you?_

Ed flinched away. That accusing voice had been silent for a while but it never missed an opportunity to pop in when it could.

It was right though.

Al, HIS Al, was dead.

Not only that but the Ed of this place was also dead.

So what was he supposed to do? Run up to this world's Al, just treat him like his own Al, like HIS Al wasn't important, hadn't even mattered?

Not likely.

It would be the same in the other direction. How would this Al feel if someone came running up who walked, talked, looked and acted like his brother but wasn't him?

Wrapping his arms around his stomach as if suddenly in physical pain, Ed slowly sank to his knees.

He might as well have been.

What was he supposed to do now?

What was worse, being without Al or knowing there was someone just like him that WASN'T him?

How was this Al even alive?

From the records he'd read, the differences had been reasonably minor. The only major one had been that Ed had died. Granted, that was a pretty big difference added to the fact that Ed couldn't remember Kimbley EVER being spotted in Central much less getting in a fight with him and DYING but still, Al should have died six months ago in this world or any other.

He should have…………..unless……………….

Unless Al had been returned to his body.

Could that even be possible? In this world, had this Ed been able to return Al to his body before he died?

Two years ago.

He had to know.

Even if it wasn't his Al, to know that there existed a world where he had SUCCEEDED, where he had saved Al………………

He needed to see him.

**Author's Note**: _So when I was younger there used to be cartoons where in the opening 30 seconds or so the main character/hero would pop up from wherever he was sitting minding his own business and announce "Egads, Dr. Doom is planning to use his recently developed shrink ray to break into the blah blah and steal blah blah. He'll be doing it at blah blah time, on blah blah date, entering through the blah blah with his two accomplices named blah blah, blah, blah, blah." My response was always "Did Dr. Doom send him an E-MAIL or something?? How does he KNOW ALL THAT????" Anyway, THAT is this chapter, kinda. It's basically exposition, here's what is happening that you need to know for the rest of the story and I couldn't think of any other way to tell it. I DID briefly consider putting it out bit by bit as the story progressed but then you'd be left wondering what the heck is going on instead of focusing on the story. SO, here it is, next chapter Ed will not spend all his time in an alleyway talking to himself, I promise._

_On a side note, I wanted to write some more drabbles but my traitorous imagination has failed me! SO, feel free to post requests if you wish and if my imagination takes off with any of them I'll write a drabble on it. Only thing is I have to sadly say no pairings please. It's not that I don't like them, I simply can't write them. I have tried; the end result is NOT pretty. So anything other than that feel free to ask and I'll try to get out some drabbles on them._

_Final note, there are things in my story that come off a Manga background. When this happens I'll make a note of it for those that don't read the Manga. First thing that I've actually already established, in the Manga Alphonse as a human had the same hair and eye color as Edward. Both had golden blonde hair and gold eyes, that will be later reflected to greater detail in this story. _


	11. Fourth Interlude

**Fourth Interlude**

_In the end, it was Roy who took action. _

_At the time, had there been anyone to hear, the noise would have sounded like the torture of an already dying animal. No one would have guessed that the sound originated from a teenage boy having a suit of armor forcibly removed from him. _

_Roy even cleaned up all the little pieces, he wouldn't allow Ed to have a single one. _

_He said it wasn't healthy._

_Surprisingly, though Ed fought, he never attempted to use alchemy._

_Roy wondered if it was because deep down Ed knew._

_He knew._

_They took the bits and pieces and they put them in a box and they nailed it shut. _

_Then Roy and his entire unit provided an honor guard for Al's final journey. _

_They took him back to Resembool and there, on a hilltop, that journey ended._

_It would seem that even the great FullMetal Alchemist, with all his tenacity, brilliance, and heart found himself finally defeated. Found the one thing that, for the second time, he could not overcome._

_Even the FullMetal Alchemist could not beat death._


	12. Chapter 7

CHAPTER SEVEN

It was night and Edward Elric was once again headed back to Headquarters. After coming to grips with what was going on and making the decision that he did want to see Al, even if it wasn't HIS Al, Ed had found he actually felt much better. Well, better considering he was stuck in an alternate world and hadn't eaten for several days but it was better than he normally felt these days.

He had also realized that, having made the decision, he had absolutely no idea where Al was. He'd not been paying enough attention to the file to note Al's current location and, given the amount of travel HE had normally done in his own world, he knew it was unlikely that Al was even in Central at the moment. For all he knew, Al wouldn't be back for months from wherever it was he currently was.

So it was back to HQ to find out.

The thought of Al possibly being back in his body, of having SUCCEEDED even if it was in another world by another Ed……………….

It didn't change the fact that he had failed Al, had killed him as far as he was concerned, but it helped.

A little.

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Jean Havoc had seen a lot in his time in the military. Death, pain, and evil were all things he'd come into contact with. He'd been trained for them, how to recognize them and deal with them.

The one thing, however, that he had never been trained to deal with was a teenage boy cradling the body of his brother, screaming as if he were the one mortally injured.

He'd never expected to witness the death of Edward Elric.

From that day until this that one scene had haunted him, plagued him in his nightmares and even sometimes followed him through his waking hours. He saw the young man everywhere he went. Sometimes he was alive and well, other times he was waiting around corners with a gaping wound in his stomach and the words, "Why didn't you save me?" on his lips.

It was for this reason that Jean Havoc really wasn't all that surprised to walk into the office of Roy Mustang and find Edward Elric scrounging around in one of the file cabinets.

It wasn't the first time.

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Edward had been unable to find a current assignment listing for Al so he was forced to rummage through the rest of the cabinets to try and find something. He hadn't used alchemy to close the door, though he had blocked off the window, as he'd not expected to be there all that long and he'd been so engrossed in his task he failed to notice the door opening until a voice suddenly spoke up.

"Hey Boss."

Ed jerked up and whirled around to find Havoc standing there, watching him.

"Havoc!"

"What are you doing?"

Ed frowned. Havoc seemed oddly calm for all that he was facing someone who was supposedly dead and HAD been dead for the last two years. He hesitated for a brief second and then said,

"I can't find Al."

"Oh." Havoc walked forward and Ed stepped back slightly.

"He isn't here."

"I'm aware of that" Ed said shortly "Where is he?"

Havoc frowned at him, "You know, you usually know everything when I hallucinate about you."

"You what?"

His response was a shrug. Ed felt himself relaxing a bit, his mind already working. Havoc thought this was either a hallucination or a dream, okay, he could work with that.

"Al was sent on a routine observation mission by the Fuhrer-Elect," Havoc suddenly volunteered.

This news caused Ed to snap out of his thought process and he looked at the man in surprise.

"The WHO???"

Walking over, Havoc idly began to clean up some of the papers that Ed had thrown about in his haste. As he gathered them he glanced over at Ed and said, "You've really been out of the loop haven't you?"

"Being dead will do that to you," Ed responded carefully.

Jean nodded, "I suppose it would," he agreed.

Placing the papers on the desk he faced Ed and said, "Fuhrer Makiz finally kicked the bucket about six months ago. When he did so, he named Mustang as his successor. Most figure he did it primarily to piss off as many people as he possibly could with his final act."

That would definitely piss people off, Ed thought, in particular every single person who outranked Mustang.

Wait a second………..

"Fuhrer Makiz? What happened to Fuhrer Bradley?"

"Bradley?" Havoc said with a frown, "There's never been a Fuhrer Bradley. Makiz was Fuhrer for around sixty years. He was a power hungry, greedy, moron and the most amazing part of his reign is that he actually managed to die of old age without being assassinated."

Okay, Ed thought, now that was a BIG difference between his world and this world.

Bradley had never been Fuhrer, had never apparently even been heard of. Did that mean that the Homunculus had never been in charge of the military around here?

"Was there a war in Ishbal here?"

"Shouldn't you already know that?"

Ed shrugged, "It's your dream not mine, you tell me."

"Oh." Havoc shrugged. "There was a war. Drachma sent in spies to stir up unrest and cause dissent. They started the war in the hopes of diverting our resources and attention while they attacked from another direction." He grinned slightly and then said, "Unfortunately they failed to take into account the fact that our firepower far exceeded theirs. They didn't last long." As he said this a shadow seemed to cross his eyes.

"The Ishbalans didn't last long either. By the time we found out what was going on they had been nearly wiped out and the animosity between them and us was not something that could ever be simply erased. Most of them live as refugees in various locations across the country now."

Okay. So that meant that the war had happened but for different reasons and had seemingly NOT been caused by a Homunculus shooting a child while disguised as a soldier. Walking over, Ed finished cleaning up the office as Havoc simply watched.

"You look older" he said suddenly.

"You're imagining what I would look like now," Ed responded, hating himself mentally for messing with Havoc in this way. It was the exact reason why he had already decided he would not let Al see him. He couldn't handle the thought of making him think, even for a second, that he was actually seeing the Ed of THIS world.

Finishing up, Ed started to walk to the door and then hesitated. Looking back over his shoulder at Havoc he said, "So when will Al be back?"

"Tomorrow."  
"Really?" Ed felt the excitement coming back. "That's great!"

"Maybe," came the troubled response and immediately Ed frowned.

"What's wrong?"

Havoc looked at him and Ed could immediately tell something was VERY wrong.

"You may not remember but a few years ago there was a train hijacking that you and Al helped take care of. The leader of that hijacking escaped jail recently and apparently has quite a grudge, against you primarily, for catching him. He's sworn revenge on you but since you're already gone………."

"He's going after Al."

Ed's jaw tightened. His Al or not, Ed wasn't going to allow ANY Alphonse Elric to be hurt.

"You said he was coming back tomorrow?"

Haovc nodded. "Yes. We were hoping to have this guy caught by the time he returned but it hasn't happened."

"Okay," Ed said simply, "I'll take care of it."

With that he turned and walked out. It seemed like an action that might happen in a dream and he wanted to keep it that way.

As he walked out of the complex he idly chewed on his lower lip in thought.

This world's Ed wasn't around to protect Al.

That was fine, he'd just do it for him.

Maybe it'd give him a reason to keep on living for a while longer.

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Behind him, Jean Havoc stood in the office for a long while after Edward left. He didn't try to go into the hallway, he knew Ed wouldn't be there.

After a while he sighed and simply said, "Bye Boss, until next time."

With that he left, trying to keep in his mind the image of Edward Elric as he'd looked in the office.

And tried to forget the last living image he had of him.

There were some things that could just never be trained for.


	13. Fifth Interlude

**Fifth Interlude**

"_I wanted to thank you for putting us all up in your home the last few days. We will of course compensate you for any--"_

"_I wouldn't hear of it. You were Al's friends and besides, Ed needed you."_

"_Is he still sleeping?"_

"_Last I checked."_

"_How is he?"_

"_You know as much as I do. Will you be taking him back with you?"_

"_Of course not. He hates the military. The only reason he was there was for Al and now--"_

"_Yes, I understand."_

"_Colonel?"_

"_Ed, I didn't know you were up."_

"_Are you leaving?"_

"_Yes, we have to go back to Central."_

"_Okay, I'll get my stuff."_

"_Ed…"_

"_What?"_

"_You don't have to go back."_

"_Yes, I do."_

"_Why?"_

"_I promised Al."_

"_Promised him what?"_

"_That if one of us died the other would keep going. I always thought it would be me. Maybe if I had been smarter I would have figured out what he was trying to tell me."_

"_Ed..."_

"_I'll get my stuff."_

"_What do you think?"_

"_If he stayed here I think he'd sit on Al's grave until the day he died. It would probably be best for him to go back. At least give him something to do. It's too quiet here, he probably wouldn't last."_

"_No, I suppose not."_

"_You'll take care of him won't you?"_

"_Of course, we all will."_

"_Thank you."_

"_You're welcome."_


	14. Chapter 8

CHAPTER EIGHT

"Sir?"

Roy Mustang glanced up as Hawkeye walked into the room.

"What is it?"

"You asked to be reminded of the time, Sir. If you want to meet the train then we need to leave now."

Mustang's eyes narrowed as he glanced over at the clock. Looking back at Riza he asked, "How is the investigation?"

"It's still ongoing. So far we've been putting enough security around the area that there shouldn't be any risk when the train comes in."

"Shouldn't be," Roy muttered darkly. He knew all too well that what SHOULDN'T happen all too often DID happen.

Pushing away from the desk, he got up and walked over to where the Lieutenant was waiting. As he did another shadow moved in the doorway and suddenly Jean Havoc appeared.

"Ready to go Sir?"

Mustang nodded. With threats from two different areas being leveled separately at him and Alphonse he knew that his subordinates were none too happy with his decision to personally go meet Al at the station and escort him back to Headquarters.

Roy didn't really care personally. He had already allowed Edward to die on his watch.

He would not allow the same to happen to Alphonse.

The group, by the time it had left the building, had grown to a sizeable number and as they got into the numerous cars already waiting at the front Mustang noticed Havoc standing still and staring in the direction of the square.

In particular, he was staring at a particular statue located in the square.

"Havoc?"

The man turned and flashed him a grin.

"Sorry Sir. It's weird; I had the oddest dream about Edward last night. I told him what was going on with Al and he said he'd take care of it."

Walking back to where Mustang stood, the man shrugged and said, "Pretty ridiculous, huh?"

Ridiculous to think that the bond between two brothers was so strong that one might return from the dead to protect the other? Especially when that one was the FullMetal Alchemist?

Roy shook his head.

"No, Jean, not at all."

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Not to far away, Edward had finally located the terrorists that were threatening Al. It really hadn't been all that hard. He'd merely gone to the worst part of Central and asked around.

Nobody had been nice enough to just tell him, but it was only around an hour or so before word got out and the terrorists came and jumped him. After that it was simply a matter of beating the crap out of a handful of them before they broke down and told him everything he wanted to know.

Now it was morning and Ed was standing in front of a large warehouse where the main group was hiding out. With a very evil grin on his face, Edward clapped his hands together and transmuted his arm into a large blade.

Then he walked into the warehouse.

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Mustang and his security escort were almost to the train station when another military car suddenly pulled out ahead of them and stopped the lead car. A man jumped out and began excitedly talking to the driver of that car. Mustang frowned and turned to Havoc who was seated next to him.

"Go find out what's going on."

Havoc did so and returned a few minutes later.

"We're getting reports of a large scale fight going on at a downtown warehouse. It's supposedly the same one we thought might be one of the hideouts of the guy we're looking for and his group."

Mustang's eyes narrowed as he leaned back in his seat. Was it a diversion to get them away from the train station and Al? Or was it merely that there was no honor among thieves and they'd started infighting?

After a few moments he said, "I want the escort split in half. One half will go to the train station and the other to the warehouse. I also want additional security sent to both locations."

Already knowing where Mustang planned to go, Havoc hurriedly said, "Sir, I don't think…"

"I didn't ask what you thought," Mustang replied sharply, "From what we know about this guy he's a coward and most likely to be at the warehouse regardless of if it's a diversion or not. We take him out and the threats against Al stop, period. Take care of it."

Havoc nodded and left once more. From the driver's seat, Mustang could see Riza shooting him a look of disapproval but he ignored it.

He would take care of this personally and, by doing so; send a clear message to the criminal element of Central.

Don't mess with Alphonse Elric.

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Edward was almost enjoying himself. It had been a while since he had really been able to kick some butt and he was surprised to find he actually missed it. It wasn't so much just getting to beat up bad guys, it was the knowledge that he was actually helping people and making a difference.

In particular, the knowledge that he was helping Al.

In front of him several thugs appeared seemingly out of nowhere and began running toward him. Easily, Ed clapped both hands together and a moment later large hands appeared out of the ground and knocked the men out cold. Immediately, Ed undid his alchemic work and moved on.

He didn't want anyone to know he had been here. He already figured the terrorists would never be believed if they insisted they had been beaten up by the very dead Edward Elric. If he left transmutations lying around, however, it would make it that much harder for them to NOT be believed.

So he cleaned up after himself.

He was on a ledge about two stories up from the main floor when the door below him burst open and the military started to pour in. Ed frowned in annoyance. Trust the military to show up just when they weren't needed, he was almost done. He just had to get to the top floor where the leader of this whole mess was hiding out. Ed had already seen the man at one point as he'd ran up a flight of stairs and he knew it would be quick work tracking him down.

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So intent was Edward on figuring out his plan that he utterly failed to notice the last addition to the troops down below. Roy Mustang marched in to the midst of the soldiers and began surveying the floor in front of them. Though dimly lit it was easy to see the bodies of numerous individuals strewn about the place.

Clearly, there had been SOME kind of fight going on.

Allowing his eyes to travel around he studied his surroundings, slowly allowing his eyes to travel upward and see what kind of vantage point possible enemies might have from above.

There was a flash of movement from a ledge and for just a moment, a brief moment, Mustang caught the image of a golden braid, red jacket, and a large blade. Then it was gone as if it had never been there in the first place.

Roy knew it really hadn't been.

Jean wasn't the only one who saw Edward Elric from time to time. Roy still, on occasion, found himself actually issuing orders to the boy only to remind himself, or be reminded, that Ed wasn't there to follow them.

"Sir?"

Breaking his gaze away from the ledge, Roy turned to the soldier that had addressed him.

Edward was dead. Perhaps one day, he'd actually believe it.

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Edward was a few streets away already by this time. He was irritated knowing he'd not been able to personally hunt down the leader but he knew there was nowhere else to go with the military swarming the place. They would catch him.

The second he'd seen the Colonel he'd been forced to flee or risk being recognized. He knew the man had seen him but he also knew that in the poor lighting it couldn't have been a very good look. Hopefully, the man would pass it off as a hallucination or something.

Ed sighed, this wasn't going to work. So far Jean had seen him and now Mustang. Add to that the fact that the terrorists were going to insist they'd been beat up by Edward Elric. Sure, they wouldn't be believed but they would be bringing up his name which would then remind Haovc, and now Mustang, of their sightings. Then of course there was the fact that the only way he'd known to get food of late had been by using his alchemy to fix things for people and then getting money or food in return. So far no one had flat out recognized him but a few had commented on his uncanny resemblance to a certain statue in the square in front of Headquarters.

It was only a matter of time before word started getting around that the ghost of Edward Elric was haunting the streets of Central and what would something like THAT do to Alphonse?

Ed already knew what it would do to him.

So he would need a disguise.

And then, once he had one, he would go see Alphonse.

It would mean a minor delay, yes, but then he'd already gone through six months back in his world.

The thought of his own world gave him pause. Edward found himself thinking of the Colonel and the others and the last sight he'd had of them. He'd TRIED to go back at first but it hadn't worked.

_And so what are you doing now? Just abandoning them? You seem to do that a lot, don't you? You abandoned your brother to die. Then you abandoned your friends to die. Now you've abandoned you brother AGAIN in favor of his look-alike. Loyal, aren't you?_

"Shut up," Edward growled but he couldn't stop the guilt that started to creep back in.

It seemed he really couldn't do anything right, could he?

He turned a corner and walked down an alleyway away from the warehouse.

For now he just wanted to have a chance to see Al back in his body.

After that……………………………………..

Well, he'd just have to wait and see.

For now, one thing at a time.

It was the best he could do.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Notes: **

**Inbi** – _For the time being the only important differences between the two worlds is that in the main world Al is dead and Ed is alive. In the alternate world, Ed is dead and Al is alive. Everything else is just me making up things because I wanted to. However, I DO have a tiny little thought in my head for a sequel if people are still interested once I get this story done. If I do that the differences between the worlds will be much more important._

**Dark Reborn** – _Ed was sent to an alternate world, not an alternate timeline. I think I have a lot more freedom with an alternate world versus an alternate timeline. _

**The Magik Dragen** – _I DID wonder where you went! Glad you're back! I have papers due myself but I'm still smack in the middle of rampant procrastination. Eventually I'll get to the point of stress and the standard "I'll NEVER procrastinate like this again!" only to do the exact same thing the next time._

_For the moment, there will not be any looks at what is going on in Ed's world. So far the chapters themselves deal with Ed in the present starting at his going to the alternate world and then onward from there. The Interludes look at his past in the his homeworld starting from Al's death and covering the six months from that point until the point in time that he crosses over to the alternate world (the start of the story so to speak). I think if I introduced ANOTHER view looking at what's currently going on in the world Ed left while he's gone it would get too confusing, and by confusing, I'm talking about confusing myself. I already have to go and pull up the chapters and interludes I've already written in order to keep track of where I am in the story and so forth. I suppose I could write a companion piece at some point that might follow what was going on back home but I'd probably wait until the main story was finished._

**Final Note**: _I've made a small change to chapter one. Originally, the idea was that Al died out in Central. However, I changed it, at least in my mind, to where he died in the dorms. Because of this it would not make sense for Roy to allow Ed to stay in the dorms SO as of now Ed did, in fact, end up staying at Roy's starting shortly after the death of Al and continuing to when he went to the other world. You will begin to see this reflected in greater detail in future interludes. _


	15. Sixth Interlude

**Sixth Interlude**

_Ed never spoke on the ride back to Central. He never really did much of ANYTHING in fact. He sat in a corner of one of the seats and stared out the window. Roy and the others took turns sitting with him but they might as well have not even been there._

_Ed might as well have not even been there._

_When they arrived back at Central Ed surprised everyone by attempting to go back to the dorms. _

_There was no way they would allow him to go back there._

_Ever._

_When informed of this, Ed simply stood in place with his suitcase at his side and stared at the ground. He never argued, never fought, never DID anything._

_He just stood there. _

_Several of them found themselves wondering how long he would stand there if they were to just leave._

_Probably forever._

_It was decided that Ed would stay at Roy's house. After all, Roy was his Commanding Officer and had a responsibility to him in that sense._

_Roy also had an actual house as opposed to the others who all lived in small apartments or in the barracks._

_So Ed went with Roy. Again there were no complaints, no arguments, no questions. _

_Ed didn't seem to care what happened to him. _

_Roy set him up in the guest bedroom at his home and told him to get some sleep while he took care of a few things. When he returned several hours later he found that Ed was still standing in the exact same spot as when he'd left._

"_What are you doing?"_

"_I want it to stop."_

"_Want what to stop?"_

"_Time."_

"_Why?"_

"_It's leaving Al behind."_

"_Ed, standing still won't stop time."_

"_What will?"_

"_Ed, I know you're hurting…"_

"_I'm tired."_

"_What?"_

"_I think I'll lay down now."_

"…_all right Ed. I'll wake you up when dinner is ready."_

"_I'm not hungry."_

"_You need to eat."_

"_I'll eat tomorrow."_

"_All right, just this once. I'll see you in the morning."_

"_All right."_

"_Good night, Ed."_

_And so it began._


	16. Chapter 9

CHAPTER NINE

Edward Elric was an absolute genius.

As he stared at his own reflection in the window of a store he knew that he wouldn't have to worry about anyone recognizing him anymore.

The first thing he'd done was get a change of clothes. He'd saved and hidden his old clothes, he really loved them after all, but he knew they were one of the first things that drew attention to him.

It was the entire reason he'd chosen those particular clothes to wear in the first place.

Being stuck in a giant suit of armor tended to draw a LOT of attention, most of it unwanted. Ed had always known Al would have to deal with people staring at him, making judgments, asking questions.

So he had grown his hair out and had dressed and acted in as flamboyant a manner as he could.

The more people stared at him the less they stared at his brother.

Not that it really mattered anymore.

The clothes he currently wore consisted of black cloth pants, nondescript shoes, a long sleeve white shirt over a black undershirt and a black overcoat. Somewhat similar to what he was used to wearing but nowhere near as flashy or ostentatious. Gloves hid his automail hand and a pair of sunglasses covered his gold eyes.

After that Ed had spent some time gathering items for the final two phases of his disguise. Once he had them he'd gone into an alleyway, he seemed to spend a lot of time in them of late, and had preformed two alchemic reactions.

The first had bleached his hair snow white while the second sent a dye over his skin causing it to darken several shades.

Finishing that, Ed had then gone to find a store window and that was where he currently stood studying his reflection.

He looked Ishbalan.

Dimly, he supposed that if he REALLY wanted to look different he should cut his hair and bangs.

Ed really loved his hair though and couldn't bring himself to do it. So instead, as an odd compromise with himself, he simply let it loose. Usually he wore his hair in a ponytail or braid so just letting it hang was definitely a difference. Add that to the fact that it was white and the look was surprisingly different.

It was possible there were those that might still think to themselves that he bore a resemblance to someone they knew, some might even go so far as to say he bore a odd resemblance to Edward Elric.

No one, though, would ever think he WAS Edward Elric.

Pushing his hair over his shoulder, Ed gave himself one final look in the window and then turned and set off.

If he wanted, he could go find Al at any time. However, the thought of having left the warehouse before the job was done irked him. Especially since he'd left the Colonel and others there alone.

Sure, he'd already taken care of almost everyone there before they'd even arrived.

Sure, it wasn't technically the Colonel, at least not HIS Colonel.

It still bothered him.

So he would go back and make sure they'd been able to handle everything.

Then he'd go find Al.

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As the train pulled into the station, Alphonse Elric was surprised to see that Mustang didn't appear to be there to meet him. In the last two years he'd gotten used to seeing the man nearly everywhere he went. He'd actually thought joining the military a month or so back would make Mustang back off just a bit, convince him that Al was old enough to take care of himself.

Instead it had made the man a thousand times worse.

Mustang blamed himself for Ed's death. Ed had been Roy's subordinate and had died in Roy's jurisdiction and nothing Al could ever say or do would convince him of anything else.

He couldn't do anything to help Ed anymore so Roy tried to make up for what he saw as his failure by taking care of Al.

Al had to admit he'd reinforced the idea at first. He hadn't exactly taken Ed's death well. As a matter of fact he still wasn't over it and he doubted he ever would be.

He'd refused to see a single picture of his brother in a very long time. It hurt too much to see photos of his brother laughing and smiling and ALIVE. Al would begin to feel that if he could just figure out the right array he could actually reach into that photo and somehow pull his brother out.

That he could bring him back.

Mentally, Al pulled himself away from that train of thought and focused on watching the scenery flash by.

By the time the train stopped a few minutes later the teenager had collected himself enough to get up, gather his suitcase and leave the train.

Once off, Al was almost immediately approached by an officer.

"Major Elric, my orders are to escort you to the barracks immediately!"

Al's eyes narrowed, "Why?"

"I don't know, Sir. Those are my orders."

Al frowned; the man was lying to him. He already knew SOMETHING was going on, Mustang had been in a serious rush to send him out of Central on what was really a trivial mission and he hadn't even suggested going with him to keep an eye on him.

Now he got back and no one that he knew was there to meet him. Not that he thought so highly of himself that he expected it or anything but it was the first time it had happened in two years.

Setting down his suitcase, Al said, "Tell me what's going on or we're going to be here for a long time."

The man tried to outlast him, he really did. Unfortunately he was dealing with someone who'd spent quite a few years in a suit of armor that lacked the ability to sleep, thereby leaving Al with long hours of nothingness on a day to day basis.

Al had learned patience during that time and he had also learned the ability to simply be in one spot without having to do or say anything.

The poor soldier had never had that advantage. He barely lasted five minutes before breaking down and telling Al everything starting with why Al had been sent off and ending with the news about some kind of fight at the warehouse that had been under watch.

Al was startled by the news. He remembered the man in question, personally he'd not thought the guy had the brain capability required to remember what he had eaten for dinner the night before let alone who it had been that had captured him during his little train hijacking incident.

The second feeling that he felt after that was anger. This terrorist wanted to hurt his brother. Granted, his brother was dead and could no longer be hurt by anything or anyone.

Still, it mattered to Al that if Ed were alive he'd be in danger right now.

"Thank you," Al said to the officer, "but I won't be needing your help."

"But Sir," the man stammered. As he did so he gestured weakly and Al could see that that train station was swarming with military, no doubt sent there to make sure he didn't try anything stupid.

Al found himself smiling slightly.

As if they could ever stop him.

Mustang should really know better.

Al was going to that warehouse.

Alive or dead, no one threatened his brother.

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_**Notes for those that don't read the manga**__: Al is based on MangaAl instead of AnimeAl simply because I think MangaAl is way cool. He's basically a calmer version of Ed. He is just as smart, just as talented in alchemy, can perform alchemy without a circle just as Ed can, and is in NO way gullible OR naïve as he is in the Anime. One of my favorite scenes in the Manga is where Ed has a little scale image in his head where he measures his own qualities against Al's and decides, to his own horror, that Al is cooler than he is. You will notice then that this Al is a lot more sure of himself, a lot more confident and, in some ways, a lot more Ed-like. _

_Second, Ed's new outfit is based on an outfit he wore in the manga that I thought was neat. If you want to see that particular manga image and what Ed looks like in his outfit go check out Page 40 of Chapter 56 of the Manga. You can find it at the Online Manga Viewer if you wish. Also, since the image is black and white, picture him with his hair down and sunglasses and you'll pretty much have the image of what Ed looks like in his disguise._

_You'll see what HumanAl looks like in the next chapter!_


	17. Seventh Interlude

**Note:** _For those that had a question about what the words "S o it began" meant from the Sixth Interlude, this chapter SHOULD answer that question. If not, let me know and I'll elaborate further._

**Seventh Interlude – First Month**

_Roy had been concerned at first about having Edward as a houseguest. Considering how volatile their relationship traditionally was he'd been prepared for screaming matches, fights and all around unpleasant conditions._

_Instead he got nothing. Ed rarely even came out of his room and, when he did, it was to drift silently along the halls to his destination and then back again to his room. Every so often Roy would actually forget the teen was there only to be reminded by a vague motion out of the corner of his eye from time to time. _

_It was almost as if his house were haunted._

_Ed didn't have nightmares, another worry of Roy's, mainly because he didn't sleep. Every now and then Roy would look in on him during the night to find him sitting on the windowsill staring out into the darkness._

_Sometimes Roy wondered what it was the boy saw._

_He also didn't speak after the initial comments he'd made when Roy had first brought him in._

_At first Mustang and the rest of Ed's friends took turns staying with the boy during the day. They were worried about what he might do if left alone._

_There wasn't any reason to worry._

_Mustang placed Ed on indefinite leave and, for the most part, left him alone._

_He didn't know what else to do._

_------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_Ed didn't know what to do anymore._

_For so long now his entire life had revolved around Al and trying to return him to his body._

_Even after Al had died there had been the trip back to Resembool and the funeral._

_Now what?_

_Everyone had come back to Central and simply started their lives once more._

_Ed felt like he had started a completely new life once he'd left Resembool._

_There had been life with his brother and the search to find a way to return his brother to his body._

_Now that was all gone and his life was what?_

_It was a life without direction._

_Ed didn't know how to deal with the guilt, he didn't know how to deal with the loss, he didn't know how to deal with rest of his life as it was laid out before him devoid of his brother or any seeming purpose._

_He just didn't know what to do._

_So he did nothing._


	18. Chapter 10

CHAPTER TEN

"I'm afraid we have a problem, Sir."

"Excuse me?" Mustang turned around to face the man who'd addressed him.

"How could we possibly have a problem? They were all pretty much unconscious when we got here."

Unconscious AND, upon waking, spouting nonsense about having been beat up by the ghost of Edward Elric.

Unwillingly, Roy found his eyes drifting back up to that catwalk where he'd seen the flash from earlier. It was empty now and he mentally chastised himself for even looking.

Ridiculous.

Several of the men were clearly drunk and it was obvious they'd gotten themselves in a fight and beat one another up.

It was even possible that, in their drunken stupor, they'd imagined Edward Elric and THAT had started the whole thing.

It was NOT, however, possible that Edward Elric had returned from the dead in any way, form or fashion.

No matter how badly he might wish it.

"We can't seem to find the leader of the group."

"You can't what?" In anger, Roy pushed past the man and headed toward the stairs. The last he'd heard the leader had been holed up in a small room a few flights up and had nowhere to go.

Behind him the soldier struggled to keep up and keep talking, all at the same time.

"We broke into the room but he wasn't there. There appeared to be a catwalk outside of the window and it looks like he got out through that. We've already dispatched search teams."

Roy shook his head in disgust. An entire squadron of men and they couldn't capture ONE terrorist?

He'd almost reached the stairs and had plans to go up and search the entire place himself when a single thought stopped him cold in his tracks.

Alphonse.

Mustang had no false ideas about the soldiers he'd sent to the train station being able to hold Al there or escort him to the dorms, Al was far too much like Ed for that.

He'd hoped the soldiers would prove to be enough of a distraction that he'd be able to clean up at the warehouse before Al arrived.

It wasn't something that would have worked with Ed; he would have just beaten everyone up. Al, however, was decidedly less violent and would take longer to get away.

Not that much longer though.

Mustang had no doubt that Alphonse was already on his way and, given that his luck seemed every bit as Ed's had ever been, the chances he'd run into the fleeing terrorist were almost guaranteed.

Spinning on his heel, Mustang barked orders to his men to immediately begin searching for Alphonse Elric. Undoubtedly finding him would also find them the terrorist they wanted.

He hoped it wasn't already too late.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Al marched with a dogged determination through the streets of Central, his hands clenched into fists as he continued to think about the man who had dared threaten his brother.

On the sidewalk nearby a group of girls gawked at the tall officer striding past, a common occurrence when it came to Al nowadays; but he was oblivious to it.

Al was oblivious to just about everything.

Except his brother.

Even in death nothing could sever the hold Ed had on him.

Nothing ever would.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ed was almost back to the warehouse when he saw Al.

The shock was so great that he actually stopped in place and just stared.

He'd not been expecting to see him so soon.

Blonde hair pulled into a ponytail at the nape of his neck swirled in the breeze and heavy bangs only served to accentuate golden eyes that matched Ed's eyes under his sunglasses. His brother wore a military uniform with a black overcoat and Ed was surprised at how much older and more mature it made the other teen look.

In an almost daze, he watched as his brother strode through the streets, alive, human and healthy.

_YOUR brother, is it? So soon you forget._

Pain and guilt crashed into him and he staggered backward against a wall. That wasn't what he meant. It WASN'T Al, he knew that. He'd just wanted to see a world where another Ed had succeeded where he had failed.

It wasn't Al.

It WASN'T.

In the back of his head the voice snickered.

In the street, Al had passed the location where Ed was standing and, behind him, Ed straightened up. He'd never had any plans or intentions of speaking or contacting this world's Al.

He'd just wanted to see him.

_What will you do now, hmmmm?_

Ed didn't know. With the disguise he could definitely get around easier so maybe………….

He never got a chance to finish that thought as from across the street a figure emerged from the alley. Ed recognized him at once as a hijacker he and Al had thwarted several years back in their own world.

It had to be the guy after Al in THIS world, he realized.

Ed immediately felt anger at the ineptness of the military. He'd left them NOTHING to do but catch this ONE guy and they'd managed to mess it up.

The second thing he felt, almost immediately after that, was fear.

Al didn't see the man who had emerged from behind him. The man, however, clearly saw Al and Ed saw the look of surprise on his face.

It was a look that was quickly replaced by one of evil. The man reached into a pocket and withdrew an enormous knife. As if from somewhere far, far away Ed saw stalk toward his brother.

_No, NOT your brother remember? What do you care?_

Shut up, Ed thought. HIS Al or not, it WAS still Al.

And nobody hurt Al.

Knowing he was too far away to reach them in time, Ed stepped forward and clapped his hands together. A moment later he dropped to his knees and slammed both palms on the ground. Immediately huge arches of rock poured across the street and slammed full force into the terrorist sneaking up on Al. So intent was he on his task that the man never even saw it coming until it was too late.

It was far too easy and Ed again found himself disgusted at the military. They should have been able to handle this.

The terrorist was slammed into a nearby wall and then dropped to the ground unconscious, the knife clattering to the ground beside him.

Ed straightened up and glanced over to make sure Al was okay.

And found himself looking straight into Al's eyes.

Oh crap.

He'd hoped Al's attention would be caught by the terrorist first and it would give Ed the few seconds he needed to get away.  
Instead, Al had apparently immediately looked to the source of the alchemy.

Which would be Ed.

Al started walking across the street to him and Ed found he couldn't move.

Oh CRAP.

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**Notes:** _**Took-Baggins**_ – In my first summary for "Through a Mirror Darkly," _**I**_ called it weird so no worries. I went back later and revised the story so it wasn't quite as vague, though still weird, and then adjusted the summary. My first idea for that drabble was actually WAY weirder!

_**Inbi**_ – You'll see more in later chapters about it but Al did not handle Ed's death well at all. The difference you're seeing is the fact that AlterEd (for lack of a better term) has been dead for two years whereas Al has only been dead six months in Ed's world. So AlterAl has had a year and a half more than Edward to deal with the death. In Ed's world he's about 16 years old and Al was 15 years old when he died. In the alternate world Al is currently 15 years old and Ed was about 14 years old when he died (AlterAl would have been 13 at that time). That's why Havoc, when he saw Ed, made the comment about Ed looking older. So the reason Al seems better than Ed is he's had a longer time to deal with it. However, even currently he's still not doing all that well. I actually had some story to that effect in Chapter Nine but I decided to take it out and save it for later.


	19. Eighth Interlude

**Eighth Interlude - Second Month**

_Roy picked up a book he saw in a store that claimed to cover the stages of grief. It laid them all out in a nice, neat list with exactly which one took place first, second, third and so forth. It even gave an idea of what to expect and approximately how long each phase would last._

_He thought it might help him deal with Ed and what he was going through._

_According to the book Ed should be feeling a sense of anger right about now._

_Around that same time, Ed started having nightmares._

_Roy had originally been concerned over the fact that Ed never seemed to sleep and never seemed to have nightmares in the short periods of time he did sleep._

_He was concerned that Ed wasn't dealing with what happened._

_Then the nightmares started and Roy wished he'd never worried._

_Ed would scream so loud that, on more than one occasion, the police showed up at his front door wanting to know who he was killing inside. Not only that but Ed proved extremely difficult to wake up and would often fight. Given that he had two automail appendages this led to numerous injuries including more than one cracked rib._

_After a while, for whatever reason, Roy found that Ed rarely had nightmares if he had someone physically in the room with him. Having noticed his exhaustion at work, as well as his injuries, the rest of his team offered to take turns spending the long nights with Ed so that Ed AND Roy could get at least some sleep._

_Roy brought a cot into Ed's room and, usually, whoever was on duty was able to sleep as well._

_Not always though because Ed still didn't actually sleep most of the time._

_Sometimes he would lie on top of the bed and stare at the ceiling as if all the answers in the world were written up there. Other times he would sit at the window and stare outside. One night when Roy was in the room he asked Ed what he saw. By this time Ed hadn't spoken a single word in a month so Roy didn't really expect an answer._

_"I'm waiting."_

_"For what?"  
"For someone to tell me what to do."_

_"Live."_

_"How?"_

_"I can't answer that for you."_

_"Who can?"  
"Only you."_

_There was silence for a long, long time. Then, as Roy watched, Ed's head slowly moved until it was resting against the windowpane._

_Then the teen started crying._

_Roy had never seen him cry, not once. Ed had raged when Al had died, then he'd gone into a state of denial, then a state of numb shock and then the zombie like state he'd been in since then._

_He had never cried._

_Getting up, Roy crossed over and pulled the teenager to his feet. He then wrapped his arms around him and hugged him._

_Ed threw both arms around Roy and sobbed. After a while he wore himself out and Roy put him to bed. The teenager slept through the night and the next day was back to normal, or what passed for normal for him nowadays, as if the previous night had never happened._

_Later that same day Roy returned the book on grief to the store. _

_There were some things that couldn't be learned in books._

_And grief could never be simply explained._

_Roy supposed he already knew that._

_Ed certainly did._


	20. Chapter 11

CHAPTER ELEVEN

Alphonse was focused on his destination when he heard the sound of hands clapping together behind him.

At first he ignored it. It wasn't the first time he had heard that sound. In fact, he'd heard it almost continuously for the first year after his brother's death.

The sound was always clear and JUST out of sight. Once, Al had run himself into exhaustion trying to chase the sound of clapping hands that he KNEW were always just around the very next corner. Al had run from headquarters when he'd heard it and when Mustang, who'd immediately chased after him, had finally caught up it had been a fight to get Al back from the alleyway he'd collapsed in.

He'd been angry at the Colonel for not letting him look around that next corner.

It had taken months before Al had stopped listening to the claps.

He'd never stopped hearing them though. The frequency had gone down with time but it had never stopped.

That was the reason why, when he first heard them, he simply ignored them.

A moment later, however, the sound was followed by the unmistakable noise of an alchemic reaction followed by the rush of air behind him as SOMETHING happened.

Al turned. Most people would have looked behind them to see what the sound and feeling had been.

Most people.

Al looked toward the source of alchemy and found himself for a second, only a second, looking straight into the eyes of his brother.

It was pathetic really. After two years of KNOWING his brother was dead, of having him die in his arms, Al still saw and heard him everywhere he went.

And when he turned and looked to where he heard the clap he saw his brother standing there and, for a brief moment, he felt relief.

Because he had never allowed himself to truly believe that Edward was dead.

And then the image was gone and the individual on the sidewalk wasn't his brother.

Al was surprised at how betrayed he felt.

He broke off eye contact with the figure and started walking across the street toward him. As he did so, he allowed his eyes to briefly flick toward the destruction in the street and the man currently slumped against the wall.

So that was what had happened.

He recognized the man and realized that, yet again, he'd been unable to do a single thing for his brother.

Someone else had done it.

Someone else was ALWAYS doing it.

Truly, Alphonse thought bitterly, it was pathetic.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Edward stood rooted to the spot as his brother—no, as the OTHER Al, walked toward him. He saw the glance toward the man knocked out across the street and was surprised to see a brief flash of bitterness flash across the other's face.

It was gone almost immediately, however, and Ed wasn't even sure he had seen it.

After a moment Al was in front of him. He opened his mouth to speak but, before he could, Ed blurted out, "Sorry, I had to be overboard like that. When I saw that guy I knew I didn't have a lot of time so I drew the simplest and quickest array I could. No time for finesse."

Al frowned, "You used a transmutation circle?"

Now it was Ed's turn to frown even as he attempted to look confused. He'd thought just before opening his mouth the first time that it was probably a good idea to disguise his voice and he just barely remembered now to do it again as he said, "Of course I used a circle, how else would I have done it?"

_Lying to your own brother now are you?_

_I thought you said he wasn't my brother?_

_So that makes it all right?  
Shut up._

The voice snickered, as it always did.

Looking at Al, Ed was surprised to see the other teen's face go blank while his eyes seemed to flash with pain and that same bitterness from before. He glanced away for a moment and clenched his fists. When he looked back again a moment later there was no trace of emotion on his face.

"Of course not," Al said calmly, "I'm sorry about that. Thank you for your help."

"No problem," Ed responded. It surprised him how calmly he was talking to Al. He felt torn, literally, between wanting to grab onto the other teen and cry and hating himself for daring to try and replace HIS Al with this Al.

Movement caught his attention and Ed saw military officers suddenly pouring into the area.

It was bizarre how they always seemed to show up just AFTER everything had been taken care of.

Glancing back, he was again surprised to see Al staring at him once more.

"You're Ishbalan."

"Nice of you to notice," Ed said lamely.

"But you know alchemy."

Ed shrugged, "So?"

Maybe he should teach a class on how to give lame responses when unexpectedly faced with the alternate of your dead brother.

Al didn't seem to really be listening. He had turned to face an approaching officer and Ed, who had not been paying NEARLY enough attention, turned as well and came face to face with Colonel/Fuher-Elect Roy Mustang.

Coming face to face with him, as opposed to just the flash he'd seen in the warehouse, Ed found himself feeling an immense relief at the thought that the Colonel was okay.

The feeling only lasted a second as Ed realized that, of course, this was not the Mustang of HIS world. That Mustang he'd left facing certain death in a basement.

Along with nearly every person who had ever cared about him.

"Are you all right?"

With a start, Ed realized that Mustang had been speaking to him.

"Sorry," he said quickly, "You just reminded me of someone for a moment."

Close enough.

Mustang's eyes narrowed slightly but he didn't press it. Instead he said, "Alphonse was telling me I have you to thank for saving his life. If there's anything I can do to repay the debt--"

"You can just owe me," Ed said quickly.

Mustang nodded, "All right. Can I at least know the name of the man I owe a debt too?"

Forced to think quickly, he'd never actually planned on MEETING Alphonse after all, Ed blurted out, "Alric. My name is Alric."

Apparently his ability to think quickly had deserted him of late.

Fortunately, Mustang and Alphonse weren't given a lot of time to think about it as across the street the unconscious terrorist woke up and began causing problems. Mustang turned to go deal with it and Al briefly turned as well to watch what was going on.

It was only a moment but, in that time, Ed came to a decision.

Nothing would be gained by staying and he was afraid if he kept talking he'd give everything away. He'd never intended to actually meet Al or risk the other finding out who he was, or who he wasn't in this case. Every second he stood there increased his own chances of doing something to give himself away.

He was already near an alleyway and it only took a step to get inside of it.

Ed was gone a moment later.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Back at the street, Al turned back to say something to Alric only to find the spot he'd occupied was now empty. Quickly stepping forward, Al started looking for him. He'd just come back from the alleyway near where they'd been standing when Mustang walked back over to him.

"What's wrong?"

"Alric is gone," Al responded, "He just took off when my back was turned."

Mustang didn't seem upset as he simply shrugged and said, "He probably had somewhere to be. Don't worry about it."

He was right, Al thought, there really was no reason to worry about the young man. Yes he'd saved his life and Al would certainly owe him for that but he shouldn't care about where the other had gone or if he'd see him again. He didn't even know him after all.

So why did he find that he DID care?

Alric was definitely an odd one. The fact that he knew alchemy and yet came from a people that not only disliked it but had been nearly wiped out by it was unusual. Then of course there was the fact that the youth had been conveniently in a position to save him JUST when he needed it and then of course the vanishing act. All of those things COULD just have simple answers or they could just be coincidences. Al could be making a lot of something out of nothing.

Frowning, Al turned and followed after Mustang to finish up with the arrest of the terrorist and the further clean-up at the warehouse. As he did so, however, he found himself thinking about Alric.

Something worked itself around in the back of his head but he couldn't quite grasp the significance of it yet.

One thing he did know, however, was he would definitely be seeing Alric again.

Alphonse really didn't like unanswered questions.

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_**Notes: **__Have no fear, it by no means ends here! See, it even rhymed! Sorry it took a bit longer to update this time. I had an assignment due last week and actually have two more due this week. Updates might get a little bit longer in between but I hope to update at least once a week at the most. The chapters are short and I already have the entire story in my head so they don't take long to write thankfully._

_On a side note I upped the rating to T for a few fights Ed will be getting into. I was reading the guidelines and noticed K only allows for minor violence with small injuries. I have no plans to seriously injure Ed but he has to get hurt somewhat in order for me to progress the plot at some point. Not seriously but probably more than what K allows according to the guidelines, I may actually be fine anyway but just in case. I'd rather be safe than sorry!_

_**Inbi**__ – I don't know when Arakawa will show what happened to Ed but I hope it's this month!!!! What's even weirder is Ed pretty much tells Al, "Well, I'm off to get in this potentially deadly situation," now it's a week later in the Manga timeline and Al hasn't even MENTIONED Ed. You'd think he might be just the littlest bit concerned, especially after how he reacted to events in Chapters 52 and 53. Oh well, maybe next chapter…………_

_Waiting to find out is one of the things that got me started off in fanfics!_


	21. Ninth Interlude

**Ninth Interlude – Third Month**

_It was in the third month that Izumi Curtis showed up._

_Ed hadn't told her about Al, he hadn't actually told anyone._

_Roy had taken care of calling the Rockbells and making all of the arrangements. In the middle of it all he had simply forgotten about the boys' teacher and the fact that she would probably want to know._

_Somehow she found out on her own._

_When she arrived it was afternoon and Roy was at the office. Word was brought in that Izumi was waiting to see him and, based on what the Elrics had told him on previous occasions, Roy prepared himself for a confrontation._

_To his surprise he didn't get one. Instead Izumi looked as though she'd been crying. Her husband Sig stood over her protectively and even he looked as though his eyes had had trouble staying completely dry._

_From Ed's stories in the past Roy wouldn't have believed the man COULD cry._

_Izumi asked what had happened._

_Roy told her._

_After that he took her and Sig to his house. Havoc was currently there in the living room working on a report and Roy excused him. He then took the man's place as both Sig and Izumi headed back to the bedroom he pointed them toward._

_There was never a sound from the room._

_After a while Roy became curious, or nervous, he was never quite sure which; and went to check on what was going on. _

_When he arrived at the door to the room he saw Edward was still sitting at the windowsill staring out into the nothingness of whatever it was he searched for. Now, however, Izumi was sitting behind him, her arms around his waist and the teen leaning back against her. On the other end of the window Sig had somehow managed to force his body onto the ledge and was likewise staring out the window._

_Together the three of them stayed that way through the rest of the day and the entire night. They never spoke a word to one another or to Ed._

_They simply helped him search._


	22. Chapter 12

_**Note:**_ _So I was so excited because I thought up the name Alric for Ed's alias and I thought I was oh so original and THEN I went and read the latest chapter from "Hesitant Return" by edpod and realized the alias being used for Ed in that story is Vic Alrec. Darn. I knew about Vic but I'd completely forgotten about the Alrec part since it hadn't been used in a while, or perhaps it was used and I'm just a dweeb and didn't notice it. You never can tell. ANYWAY, clearly I'm not nearly as original as I thought (sadness!) and I must have read the name a while ago when I started reading the story, it got lost in the depths of my subconsciousness at some point and then happily popped back out when I was trying to think of an alias. I knew I should have gone with Bob. SO to make a REALLY long note slightly shorter I wanted to make sure and give Edpod credit for providing me with the subconscious impetus for Ed's alias in this story. Thank you much!_

CHAPTER TWELVE

For the next week Edward followed a simple routine that consisted of doing exactly two things. The first was using alchemy to fix things in return for food and/or money. He made sure that he always used an array and that he never did anything very large. Ed tried to appear average, even slightly below, and it seemed to work. He made just enough to keep himself going and that allowed him to focus on the second thing he did during that week.

He followed Alphonse.

It was a stupid thing to do and Edward knew it. For one thing, Al apparently never went anywhere alone. It was usually always with Mustang and THAT meant a very large security escort trained to see people, like Ed, following them. Ed made sure to stay back, however, and, so far, had managed to avoid being seen.

This fact did not raise his opinion of the military's security capabilities.

Another reason it wasn't good for him to follow Alphonse was that Ed knew deep down it wasn't healthy. It was like he was following the shadow of Al through the streets hoping that, at any moment, it would lead to his brother.

Truly, it wasn't healthy.

Still, Ed followed and, in a very strange way, he was happy.

He had a purpose again.

Ed found it a very odd feeling to be happy. At least, he THOUGHT that was what he felt. It had been so long since he'd been ANYTHING that, when he did feel something, it was difficult to define it. However, in one single week he'd found himself actually noticing the world around him, actually wanting to go out and get involved.

It was as if he'd been gone for a very long time and now suddenly was finding his way back.

_What will you do then? Just follow a ghost for the rest of your life?_

_I don't know._

_Does it make you happy?_

_I think so._

_What if you lose him as well? Will you find another alternate world and just replace your brother again?_

_I'm not replacing him._

_Sure you are._

_No. I'm just looking out for this Al. He doesn't have anyone else._

_Then why are you having such a hard time following him?_

_He needs me._

_No he doesn't. _

_Yes he does._

_Does he need you like your brother needed you?_

Ed's jaw tightened and he leaned against back against the corner of the building he was currently hiding behind. On the other side Alphonse was having lunch with Mustang, Havoc, Hawkeye, Falman, Breda, Fury and Armstrong. Most of the restaurant they were at had been emptied out and cordoned off by security and Ed knew there was no way he could get any closer without being seen.

Knowing that constant peeking around the corner was going to get him caught; Ed decided to call it a day and left the area. He would check back periodically throughout the day but he already knew Al's routine had him primarily at Central or the Library.

Apparently, this Al didn't have much of a life outside of the military.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ed had only gone about a block or two when he caught sight of a man walking towards him. Frowning, Ed studied the man. There was something familiar about him. Trying to look casual, Ed walked over and leaned against a wall where he could watch the man approach. The man had gotten to about fifteen feet away, his head focused on the ground, when Ed suddenly figured it out.

The file Mustang had showed him concerning the rogue alchemist they'd been after had contained a picture and it was the man in the picture that was currently walking toward him.

Ed backed up closer against the wall studying his shoes and, a moment later, the man walked by without a glance. After another moment, Ed followed him.

He'd speculated right after arriving here that the man they'd been after had used the circles in the basement to escape to this world and that was why they'd not been able to find him. Of course it was also possible the man's remains had been in that room the Chimeras had broken through. There hadn't exactly been time to search it after that had happened.

So that meant this guy COULD be the alchemist from HIS world or it could be the alternate from THIS world. Either way, Ed felt there was no harm in following him. It was just possible that, in either case, perhaps he had the Kranz Oppendor book and Ed could figure out how those circles had worked and why the ones in this world hadn't worked. If he could figure it out it would open up the possibility of Ed being able to go back.

_You want to go back now do you? Why?_

_I left the others in danger._

_Don't you think it's a bit late now?_

_I don't know. That's what I want to see._

_And then what?_

_I don't know._

_You certainly live your life in the moment don't you? No long term plans._

_Maybe because I still don't know if I'll be here long term._

_You seem a bit conflicted you know. One second this Al is your brother, the next he isn't. Then you want to go back, then you don't, then you're back to your original plan that never worked all that well in the first place._

_Since when did you get so chatty?_

_What do you mean? You're the only one talking. Perhaps you're feeling confused? Guilt over all the screw-ups you've done in your life? _

_Over daring to feel happy after the pain you've caused to so many? _

_After you've let so many down?_

_SHUT. UP._

So intent was he on that internal argument that Ed didn't even see the man he was following duck into an alleyway. In fact, he'd actually taken several steps past the alleyway before he realized the man wasn't there anymore. Turning back, Ed saw the opening he'd missed and headed to it.

Once in he didn't see the man and walked forward carefully to try and find out where he had gone. Almost immediately he noticed a door set into the wall at the far end of the alley. Thinking perhaps the man had gone through there, it was really the only place he COULD have gone, Ed walked toward it slowly. Hopefully he'd be able to sneak in, see what was going on and then get out again. After that he could come back at night and check things out more thoroughly.

Unfortunately, life rarely allowed Ed to have it so easy.

He'd barely reached the door when it creaked open, seemingly, on its own.

Uh-oh.

Already guessing where it was heading, Edward barely had enough time to lunge out of the way before the first chimera hit the spot he'd just recently been standing in.

In his mad lunge Ed lost his footing and fell and had to quickly scramble to his feet to face the six chimeras currently in front of him.

Wait a minute, SIX?

Not only that but these creatures were not the poorly constructed, falling apart animals he'd seen from before in his own world. No, these were sleek and well created, comprised mainly of teeth and claws. Clearly this answered the question of which version of the alchemist he'd been following.

The alchemist from his world was an idiot.

His alternate version in this world clearly was not.

The chimeras stalked toward him, their movements graceful and sleek suggesting speed and agility.

If he had to describe them he would say they were built like cats.

Really LARGE cats.

That wanted to eat him.

Now wasn't that poetic justice?

Realizing he couldn't take them all and also knowing he didn't have enough time to perform alchemy, Ed did the only thing he could.

He ran.

He quickly found out one thing.

The movements of the animals did not just SUGGEST they were fast.

They WERE fast.

Extremely fast.

And Ed was not.

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_I honestly planned on having this chapter go further but when I wrote it all out I realized, "Wow, that's rather anticlimactic," so I split the entire thing in two, expanded it and made two chapters instead of one. Bright side of that is that Chapter 13 is almost entirely finished and I can post it fairly soon. I actually didn't want to let the last chapter end with Ed running away either but I kind of painted myself into a corner in terms of where I knew the story was going and how it would get there. I tried writing the ending of that chapter a half dozen different ways to keep Ed from having to run off but none of the other endings worked that well. So here you have it, the second chapter to end with Ed running. Next chapter coming soon!_

_Thank you again, as always, for all your great reviews! _


	23. Chapter 13

_As I mentioned before, Chapter 12 and 13 were really one long scene that I cut into two chapters for dramatic effect so, in my head at least, it's one long scene with a brief commercial break in between. Because of that I decided to keep the chapters together and not break them apart with an interlude chapter. Have no fear though for those that like the interludes, the next one will be posted after this chapter and before fourteen._

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

As much as he hated the thought, Ed figured out pretty quickly that he only had one choice if he wanted to live.

He was going to have to try and make it back to the military.

_So sending six chimeras straight to your brother is your idea of protecting him?_

_First off, he's not my brother… _

_If you say that enough maybe you'll actually believe it one day…_

_And SECONDLY, I just need a minute to transmute. No one will get hurt._

_You can guarantee that? You think highly of yourself don't you?_

_You saw the size of that escort; they should see me coming from a mile away._

_Should. I thought you had decided they were all idiots._

_I don't have any other choice._

_Selfish, aren't you?_

_No._

_Yes, you are._

_Fine. Now shut up. I need to concentrate._

Pushing the thoughts away, Ed bolted down a nearby alleyway and ran toward the back. He knew if he got over the wall that he'd be right in front of the restaurant that the others had been in. In the chaos caused by six chimeras appearing he should be able to transmute without anyone noticing he'd not used an array, handle the chimeras and then get away again.

He just hoped the military would still be there.

The blasted creatures were far too fast for their own good and they were nearly on him as he leapt up on a dumpster and lunged for the wall. He barely grabbed the lip and dragged himself over as two of the creatures pulled themselves up on either side of him.

Falling over the other side, Ed hit the ground with a heavy thud and scrambled as both creatures came over after him. From the other side he could hear the others coming as well. Managing, somehow, to get to his feet, Ed turned to run across the street.

It was about this time that he found out another fun fact about the chimeras. He'd noticed earlier that the animals had tails which were unusually long and whiplike. He'd figured it was probably for greater stability to allow them even more speed and agility.

Now he found out that his original observation was, in fact, the correct one.

One of the chimeras stopped after its jump over the wall and snapped its tail out. The blow caught Ed directly in the back just as he was turning and threw him forward with a truly impressive speed. He hit the ground, rolled into the street, and kept rolling until he fetched up right against a pair of booted feet.

Trying to shake the stars out of his eyes, Ed looked up and found himself staring into the eyes of one very startled Alphonse Elric.

_So much for no one getting hurt, hmmmmm?_

Looking back, Ed saw that all six chimeras had made it over the wall and were now heading right for the two of them. Ed struggled to get up but the blow had dazed him and he slumped back down against Al's legs. Al seemed as stunned as if HE had been the one whacked and just watched as the creatures came.

Three of them leapt into the air and, for the final time, Ed tried to get up. Again he failed and then it didn't matter anymore.

They were out of time.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Without warning, a shadow fell over the two of them as someone stepped directly in front of them and into the path of the Chimeras. There was the sound of fingers snapping and just like that three of the creatures simply exploded.

Gunfire rang out and, suddenly, there were no more chimeras.

Well, no more live ones that is.

For a moment Ed just stared blankly at the destruction.

Perhaps the military wasn't so useless after all.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It had happened again.

Alphonse had just stepped out of the restaurant, shortly ahead of Mustang who was talking to someone, when his brother had leapt over the wall across the street.

He'd tried to dismiss it at first. Clearly the hallucinations involving his brother were getting worse; they were going from auditory to visual. He might need to admit to Mustang that he was still having them and they were escalating.

Then he'd realized there did seem to be an actual person that had just landed on the ground over the wall.

Chimeras leapt over the wall after the figure and Al found he could only watch the action as it unfolded. A moment later an attack by one of the creatures sent the figure flying until he landed up against Al's legs. Looking down, Al realized the person was Alric.

Alric, not Ed.

Looking back up, Al saw six chimeras sprinting toward them. At his feet Alric tried to scramble up but collapsed again. In the back of his mind something screamed at Al to DO something but he found he was momentarily frozen.

Too bad it only took a moment for the chimeras to get there.

Thankfully it was about that time that Mustang stepped forward and saved them both, followed shortly by the rest of the escort.

Once again Al found himself realizing just how useless he was.

It wasn't bad enough that he couldn't save his brother.

He couldn't even save himself.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ed was still processing the fact that he wasn't dead when Al knelt down over him.

"Are you all right?"

"Yeah," Ed stammered. He just barely remembered to disguise his voice before he spoke and vaguely found himself amazed that his glasses had apparently stayed on throughout the entire event.

"I'm sorry."

Al frowned, "For what?"  
"Putting you in danger," Ed said, "I'm sorry."

"It's all right," Al replied, "I suppose we're even now."

As they spoke, Mustang walked over to them. After frying three of the animals he'd gone over to ensure they were dead and now came back. Kneeling down on Ed's other side he said, "Mind telling me what that was all about?"

Thinking fast, Ed replied, "I'm not sure. I saw this guy and I thought he looked like a friend of mine so I went after him to say hello. He went down an alleyway and I went as well thinking perhaps it was a shortcut. Anyway, there was a door at the end and next thing I know I've got six overgrown cats wanting to eat me."

It was close to the truth, close enough that Ed hoped he wouldn't make a slip-up if questioned further.

"Can you show me where the alleyway is?"

"Of course." Ed tried to get up and, as he did so, Al grabbed him to help. Immediately, Ed tried to pull away but two things happened at the same time.

The first was that Ed discovered he'd apparently picked up a nasty gash in the arm somewhere along the way and, judging by the feel of it, a couple of cracked ribs from that little tail trick by the chimeras.

The second discovery was made by Al.

He was right in the middle of helping Ed up when he suddenly jerked as if in surprise and let go, stepping back in shock. This of course led to Ed stumbling and being caught by Mustang who quickly made the same discovery.

Al spoke first.

"You have an automail arm."

"Yeah," Ed said, trying to sound calm, "things like that happen in wars. Do you have a problem?"

"No," Al said quickly, "Not at all. I just…I was surprised is all."

Ed made no response. Automail wasn't as rare as it had been before the war so he knew they wouldn't think it unusual for him to have an automail arm, even an automail right arm. However, having a right automail arm and a left automail leg just above the knee would probably be too much of a coincidence to be believed.

So that left him with one option.

He absolutely had to prevent them from finding out about his leg.

_And how do you propose to do that?_

Ed didn't get a chance to respond because, by that time, Mustang and Al had realized also that he was injured and insisted on taking him to the hospital. Ed refused but the two insisted and he quickly realized that not only was he in too much pain to even think about fighting or trying to run away but his continued refusal would quickly make them suspicious and that was one of the things he DIDN'T want.

So he allowed them to take him.

_Didn't you just decide they couldn't find out about your leg?_

_I'll figure it out._

_You've not been very good about that lately have you?_

_I SAID I'd figure it out!_

_Fine, figure it out then._

_See if I care._


	24. Tenth Interlude

**Tenth Interlude – Fourth Month**

_Izumi and Sig only stayed one month. For the most part they spent it following Ed around or sitting on the windowsill with him._

_They never demanded anything of him, never tried to get him to do or say anything._

_They were just there._

_At the end of the month they offered to take Edward back with them to Dublith._

_Somewhat to his own surprise, Roy refused._

_To his even greater surprise, Izumi didn't force the issue. _

_Instead she and Sig packed their bags, said good-bye to Edward and left. _

_Roy worried after they had gone. Over the month they'd been there Edward had actually started moving around and even talking a little bit. Sometimes he'd even come out of his room._

_Now that Izumi was gone Roy wondered if Ed might not retreat right back into his shell again._

_He wondered if perhaps he'd made a mistake in not letting the boy go._

_Perhaps he was just being selfish._

_The next day after Izumi and Sig left, Roy got up and got ready for work._

_When he walked out he found Edward standing in the hallway outside of his door, fully dressed and ready._

_It was the first time Roy had seen him like that since Al's death._

_"What are you doing?"_

_"I want to go."_

_"Go where?"  
"With you."  
"Why?"_

_Ed didn't answer. After a moment Roy decided not to press the issue and simply walked down the hall._

_Ed followed._

_It seemed the best he could do for the moment._

_For Roy, it was enough._

_Perhaps he hadn't made the wrong choice after all._


	25. Chapter 14

_**Note: **__I know, I'm sorry! Life got crazy for a while and I couldn't update. Then my friend got me started on another television show and it became absolutely necessary that I watch the ENTIRE thing in a very short period of time. Anyway, life has calmed down once more so I should be able to update more often. On a side note, there are only four Interlude chapters left. The next two will take the backstory right up to where the story starts in Chapter One and then I've got ideas for two others after that. Once those are done the story will simply go chapter by chapter until completed WHICH shouldn't be too much farther since it's a little over halfway done now, I think. I say I think because I originally thought this entire story would be around six to seven chapters long. Goes to show what I know._

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

In the end Ed didn't have to think very much at all.

In fact, it was so easy that he was mildly embarrassed that he worried in the first place.

Ed simply refused to allow Al or Mustang into the room while he was being examined. 

They didn't argue very much, Ed WAS a stranger after all, at least as far as they were concerned, and there were no worries about the doctor seeing his leg as he couldn't say anything without breaching doctor/patient confidentiality and all that.

After binding up his ribs and bandaging his arm, the doctor wanted to keep Ed overnight for observation but Ed shot that down pretty quick. He hated hospitals and there was absolutely no way that he was staying in one a second longer than he had to.

Not to mention the fact that he fully planned to go hunt down the jerk that had sicced the mutant cats on him.

Alter stupid alchemist or not that guy had SERIOUSLY pissed him off and there was no way the FullMetal Alchemist was letting him get away with it.

Even if he wasn't currently acting in the capacity of the FullMetal Alchemist.

After getting dressed, carefully in deference to his injuries, Ed walked out and found Mustang and Al waiting for him in the lobby. About half the military was there as well, as an escort, but Ed ignored them.

"You didn't have to wait you know."

Mustang shrugged, "We need an official statement from you anyway. We checked out the location you told us about. The only thing there found was a body."

The only thing?

Ed glanced at him and said, "Who was it?"

"We were hoping you could tell us."

Ed frowned, that meant he'd have to go identify the body assuming, that is, that he even knew who it was. 

He actually had an idea already but it seemed implausible. What were the odds……………..

Mustang and Al were both watching him and Ed shook off his train of thought and gestured toward the door.

"Well, might as well get going then."

This time it was Al who frowned, "You want to go now?"

"Why not?" Ed said, "I happen to have my day free, let's go!"  
Without waiting he headed out and the two, after a brief pause, fell in behind him.

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He was short.

Al had noticed it vaguely before but it didn't really come home to him until he found himself walking behind Alric out the door.

Alric was short. Ed had always been short, maybe THAT was why he found himself constantly comparing the two.

Even now as they walked he found himself wondering if Ed would have been anything like Alric had he lived another few years. 

It was possible.

He frowned and pushed it away.

Ed couldn't be replaced by someone who looked or even acted like him and ESPECIALLY not by someone Al had only met briefly on two occasions.

Not now.

Not ever.

Even if there was a part of him that wished it.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The alleyway was cordoned off when they arrived but Ed marched through it as if it weren't even there and walked back to the door at the far end.

This time nothing ran out to try and eat him and he was able to walk right in. Once inside he could see immediately that whatever had been there had been cleared out in a hurry.

Vaguely, Ed wondered what exactly it was that had made the jerk so paranoid. After all, assuming this had been the hideout of this world's psycho alchemist, he would have no idea who Ed even was and, even considering it had been HIS world's alchemist and he'd magically upped his skill level, he'd have no way of knowing Ed had followed or of recognizing him under his current disguise.

So why sic a bunch of chimeras on him, blow the cover of whatever it was he was doing and then skip town?

There was a hand on his shoulder and then Mustang was steering him toward a corner where a body lay with a sheet thrown over it. Glancing at him, Mustang said, "Are you ready?"

Ed shrugged; it wasn't like he hadn't seen death before.

One of the soldiers removed the sheet and Ed grimaced in spite of himself. Apparently the chimeras had had a snack before they'd been sent after him.

Definitely not a nice way to go.

Moving forward, Ed stood above the corpse and studied it for a few moments. There wasn't a lot left but what was there was enough for Ed to know that he no longer had to worry about there possibly being two Rogue Alchemists in this world.

There might not even be one anymore since he was still going off a theory that the one from his world had used the circles in the basement to flee to this world.

"So do you know who it is?"

"No," Ed answered immediately, "I've never seen him before. Sorry."

He didn't make eye contact with Mustang as he spoke and quickly turned to walk back out the way he'd come. He'd barely made it a few steps before Al was in front of him.

"Where are you going?"

Ed shrugged, "You don't need me here anymore."

"Actually," Mustang's voice came from behind him, "I do still need your statement. I don't suppose you'd mind coming down to headquarters to give it would you?"

Crap, Mustang knew he was lying. It was the only reason he'd have for wanting to keep him around any longer since Ed already knew he could give a statement right then to any one of the soldiers currently milling about. 

Forcing a pleasant smile, Ed turned and replied, "Sure, that'd be fine as long as it doesn't take too long. I do have places to be you know."

Mustang smiled back, "That's funny, I thought you said earlier you had the day free."

Curse the man and his blasted memory.

Returning an equally pleasant smile Ed said, "You're right I did say that. Well then, in that case, shall we go?"

"Of course." Mustang stepped forward and gestured, "After you."

Wordlessly Edward stepped forward out the door. Behind them Al watched with a blank expression on his face. The interaction between the two had been almost a pure channeling of the way he'd often seen his brother and the then Colonel interact.

A shadow darkened the doorway and Mustang glanced back in, "Are you coming Alphonse?"

Al nodded, "Of course."

He walked out and saw Alric standing in the sun idly studying something that had caught his attention further down the way. The sun glinted off the other teen and for a brief second his hair was not white but gold. 

Al froze, his heart twisting in his chest.

STOP IT, he ordered mentally but of course his emotions weren't in any mood to listen.

Realizing that Mustang was looking at him in concern and that Alric had glanced over as well, Al forced a blank expression on his face and started walking toward the car.

As they walked, Al found his feet slowing almost against his will. Alric moved on ahead of him as did Alric.

The two had almost reached the car when someone suddenly said, "Hey Ed, wait up."

It took a moment for Al to realize it was his own voice that had spoken.

It took about a moment later to realize that ahead of him Alric had stopped and had turned to wait for him.

Al felt his world stop.


	26. Eleventh Interlude

Tenth Interlude – Fourth Month

**Eleventh Interlude – Fifth Month**

_It was in the fifth month that Roy started sending Ed on small missions around Central. Mainly it was because he was worried about the boy's growing dependence on him. It wasn't that he minded, per se, it was rather that he wanted Ed to be able to stand on his own two feet, to be able to move forward on his own without fear of falling._

_Of course it probably didn't help that he usually sent one of his officers with the boy or at the very least had them following him. He knew Ed wouldn't do anything to himself because of the promise to Al but he didn't put it past him to try and get himself killed in an attempt to circumvent the promise._

_Ed always did have a devious mind._

_Ed did everything asked of him without question or complaint and seemingly without care. That worried Roy probably more than anything else. An obedient Ed was an Ed that had something seriously and deeply wrong with him._

_Something that possibly couldn't be fixed._

_He deliberately sent the teen on ridiculous missions in the hope that something, anything, would spark a reaction. At this point he'd be thrilled to even be in a fight with the kid, anything other than the silent obedience he received._

_Nothing worked. Ed seemed content, insofar as much as he could be content, to simply do as he was told. _

_Finally, toward the end of that month, Roy removed Ed's name from the inactive list and put it back on active duty._

_He told himself it was another step toward Ed's recovery, that he was simply trying to get the boy back into the swing of things._

_It wasn't that he was starting to give up any hope of the old Ed ever returning._

_It wasn't that he was starting to feel his own despair at the boy ever fully recovering._

_It wasn't._


	27. Chapter 15

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

**Note:** _I'm sorry it's so short, I tried extending it but it didn't seem right when I went back and read it. I posted the previous interlude, this chapter and then I'll post the next interlude as well to make up for it. That will be the last official timeline interlude as it will bring the Interlude back flashes right up to the point in Chapter One where the story starts. The final two interludes will deal with snapshots of two specific events. After they are posted the story will continue with just chapters because I can't think of anymore interlude ideas!_

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

Al knew.

Oh maybe he didn't know it logically, maybe the actual thought had not yet crossed his mind but, still, he knew.

Ed was sure of it. He'd seen it in the way Al responded to him, the way he acted around him. Though they'd only been together three times now officially Al reacted to him as if they had known each other for a long time.

Really, it surprised him. He'd always known the depth of his own bond to Al but he had never thought it went the other way.

In Ed's mind, he could never survive without Al but he'd always believed Al could and would make it without him.

It was one of the reasons he'd not been terribly surprised to see Al living his life even after finding that the Ed of this world had died.

He was beginning to believe he'd made a gross error in judgment on that one.

_So, are you going to tell him?_

_No._

_Why not?_

_Hi, I'm Ed but not YOUR Ed. How's that for a constant knife in your gut?_

_About the same as it feels for you?_

_Exactly. I won't have him feeling the same way._

He tried, he did. After the hospital he attempted to distance himself somewhat from Al. Ed stayed next to Mustang, didn't wait for the other boy when he walked away. In short, he tried to act like a stranger.

When they were walking out of that room in the back alleyway Ed was concentrating on "being a stranger" and it was for this reason that, when he heard Al, he automatically turned without consciously hearing what had even been said.

Until he saw Al's reaction.

_Did he just say Ed?_

_And did you just respond to it?_

_OH. CRAP._

Desperately, Ed forced himself to stay calm, forced his face to stay empty. Raising an eyebrow and trying to quash the tremor in his voice he said, "I'm sorry, did you say something Al? I didn't quite hear you."

_You're a bastard._

_I know._

Al didn't respond to him, just stared at him with the look of one who had just found something they'd lost only to immediately lose it again.

Or maybe realize they had never really found it in the first place.

Ed let himself look concerned, not a hard feat at that particular point in time. He stepped forward, past Mustang who had also stopped and was looking equally concerned.

"Al? Are you okay?"

Al still didn't respond and now Mustang stepped past him and over to the younger man. Ed forced himself to stay still; he was a stranger after all.

A stranger, don't forget.

Don't forget.

Don't.

He watched Mustang as he spoke to Al and knew this couldn't keep happening. They'd barely even been together and already Al was falling apart. Ed hadn't expected that, he had always assumed Al would deal with his death far better than if their situations were reversed. Then when he'd seen this Al walking confidently through the streets apparently years after this Ed's death he'd been sure of it. He would admit it hurt to think Al could get over him so easily but he wouldn't wish the amount of pain he felt on anyone.

Now he wasn't so sure he had judged the situation correctly. Perhaps Al hadn't dealt with the death of this world's Ed any better than Ed had dealt with the death of his world's Al.

Perhaps this Al just hid it better.

_So, what will you do?_

_I don't know._

_If you leave him behind what will happen to you? Will you go back to the way things were before?_

_I don't know._

_It feels like you've been offered your life back again doesn't it? Something other than the fog you've been in for the last six months, yes?_

_Has it really been six months? It can't have been that long._

_An actual life versus a shadow life, which will you choose and what will the impact be on poor Alphonse?_

_I don't know, please stop asking._

_All right._

_--_

Al tried to remember how to breathe and forced a shaky grin at Mustang in response to the older man's inquiries.

He was so pathetic. One little thing and he was willing to believe the impossible, to believe his brother had somehow returned from the dead.

Of course if anyone could accomplish such a feat it would have been Edward, right?

Pulling his shattered emotions together as best he could, Al put them back inside the box he'd created for them inside his head and shut the door. A strange haze seemed to fall over him, the same haze he'd been living in since Ed had died as a matter of fact, and he walked forward.

He could see Alric giving him a look of concern but he ignored it as he walked past the other youth. He knew the action confused Alric but he couldn't help it. At the moment even looking at the other boy just hurt too much.

It had been years already, YEARS; shouldn't he be over this by now? Shouldn't he be better?

Even as he thought that, however, Al knew there was no time span that could pass that could make it better, that could get him over it.

In fact, the other thought he found himself thinking as he walked was how he'd made it this long.

And how he expected to even make it another day.


End file.
